Flipping the fuck out

[synapticjava]

Uh, yeah, so I'm in the middle of a nervous breakdown.

Just went to sign my lease and had another panic attack walking into and out of the building and then again while I was driving back towards school. I had to fucking pull over to keep myself from hitting another car.

I have the lease, but I haven't signed it yet. I'm freaking the fuck out. I can't handle this. Maybe I'll talk to my mom and see about moving back home. BK would probably give me my job back.

I just...I can't do this.

Comments

[reddwarf75.livejournal.com]

Cutie, what is it that scares u so?? Living on your own? Being responible for bills being paid? If u have the means to support yourself, I think u'll be fine. U are a responsable adult *hug*
Marie

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

It's not so much the alone thing - I like alone, it's quiet. *g*. It's the responsibility thing that scares me.

Thank you. *hugs*

[karenbear.livejournal.com]

Oh sweetie, what happened? You sounded so excited before. I know it's a big step, but it's a great step and one I know you're capable of handling. Don't do anything rash while the memory of the panic is fresh in your mind. Leave it a little, calm down and think it through. You're going to be okay. *hugs*

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

That's what happened - I realized how big of a step it is. Just makes me a little *wibble*, that's all.

I'm 100% better now. Thank you, hun. *huge hugs*

[tsavoritegarnet.livejournal.com]

Having your own place with all that stuff on paper is a big change alright. Give yourself a few hours to calm down and catch your breath. Then go with what you want to do. :-) It'll be ok. Really.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Thanks, babe. *hugs*

[trepkos.livejournal.com]

Hey, stick with it!
You can do this!
I moved out at 19 and rented a house, and nothing horrendous happened to me.
You are probably just tired out from working too hard.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Thank you - and yes, I think you're absolutely right.

[scottrossi.livejournal.com]

you can do it! living on your own is so invigorating and so empowering. if you can do it successfully, you will be able to do anything. and worry not, the worst that could happen is that you won't be able to make ends meet or something and you can just move back home. its not a big issue really! i have confidence in you. i did it when i was 18 and it worked for 2 years before things went south. you can do it!

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Thanks - I'm better now:)

[nashmaveric.livejournal.com]

Hey sweetie, it's not as bad as all that. Unless it is. In which case what do I know ::hugs:: Either way, it's up to you. Whatever you're up to, right?

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

No, you're right. It's not that bad. I can do it.

*hugs you tight*

[amejisuto.livejournal.com]

Darlin just take a deep breath and wait for the panic to go away. Is it living alone that bothers you? Or the responsibility? You'd probably be miserable if you backed out now that you found the place that you love and a life that you love. Give yourself some time. Babble to us if you need to, we're here.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Thank you, babe. *huge hugs*

I think I just needed to know I could do it - now I'm all excited again.

[imaginaryimages.livejournal.com]

Take a deep breath (or many).

YOU. CAN. DO. THIS.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

*hugs you tight*

Thank you.

[imaginaryimages.livejournal.com]

No problem, every time you feel overloaded, overwhelmed or just scared shitless, just imagine all your cyber buddies giving you a great big hug (or kick in the ass, which ever you need, we'll oblige!) LOL.

Taking that first big step can feel like it'll likely kill you but when you realize it can't, it won't, it's the best feeling of accomplishment! And pretty soon, you'll be taking that apartment for granted!

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Yeah, most likely that's what'll happen. Now that it's getting closer and closer, I'm feeling a lot more settled about the whole thing, so Yay!

[lunabee34.livejournal.com]

Yes, you can, Brad. I know you can. I'll look for you on AIM tonite.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Thanks, darlin. *smooch*

[wilde-moon.livejournal.com]

Don't you dare! You can do this. I know it, and you know it too. You just have to make yourself get over this last step. What you can't do is move back home and work for BK again. When was the last time I smacked you upside the head? Do I have to make up for all that time? *glares*

Take a deep breath, grit your teeth, and sign it. This is the hardest part, but once you do it you'll feel 100 times better.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

*hides from the glares and headslaps*

And you're right - now, after it's signed and everything I do feel better. Just...wierd. I'm like, a full-fledged adult and stuff now. *meep*

[wilde-moon.livejournal.com]

I know the feeling.

[tabaqui]

Silly thing. Of course you can! You tempted a go-go boy! You can do whatever you like.

You wrote fanfic and they loved it and now you might win an award!! You're tough and you CAN do this.

Really truly.

*hugs you hard*

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

*hugs you tightly*

Thank you, hon. Really.

[rivulet027.livejournal.com]

You can do this. You can. There are greater things waiting for you life then BK, okay?

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Heh. Thank you:)