Hyper Little Thoughts

Crackling static dribbles from the stereo speakers;
the crashing wind screams and freezes through the cracked window
as I slice through the night on burning rubber.
The lights of the city glow like embers against the twilight sky behind me.
My slick palms grip the wheel, knuckles white and aching.
Every piece of me is throbbing, exhaling, humming, singing.
Laughter is pressed against my lips,
my tongue rolling against my teeth in a silent grin.
I cannot keep still the thoughts and fantasies that hopscotch through my mind,
the daydreams and longings that pierce this newly unlocked vault that is my heart,
my soul.
Even as my shoe mashes the iron pedal against the synthetic floor
I feel myself drifting, floating, sailing slowly and steadily
towards a place I feel safe, towards a place I feel normal again.
To you.

This is but one memory of a thousand
which would that I could be rid of.
Only one of a thousand sleepless nights remembering rememberings
which I only wish to forget.

another sunset bleeds up my chest.
I am blinded
as the dying daylight catches fire against my face.
cool wind dusts my body;
another night is breathing softly against me
and pushing the hands further around the clock.
the window panes glow with my reflection
like a television set turned on against the darkness.
somewhere in this empty apartment coffee drips
echoing like rain in a gutter
its dark scent filling this empty space
with the smells and sounds
of an unused
unwanted
home.