I Want

[synapticjava]

I want to wake up
and know that I am me,
whomever me should be
and understand that the me I am
doesn’t have to be any one him or thing.

I want to open my eyes
and see the world changed
but still the same
with eyes clear and unglazed
by tears or sleep or pain or tiredness.

I want to touch
with fingers unmarked
by flame or bruise or blade
and feel the wet breeze against
my drowning flesh.

I want to taste
without the familiar ash
of longing and sour regret
glued against my tongue
and drink deep this life.

I want to sleep deep
and guarded against the night
without dreams of what once was
and never will be
and without this numbness creeping into me.