The perfect dinner breakfast after-work treat..

Damn. I only had 2 cocktails after we closed, and I'm feeling mighty happy.

I love working in a bar. Teehee. Even if I only made $20 tonight (grr). And even if I have to be up in 5 hours for school hell school. Ah well. Suck it up, it's only an hour and a half. And then I can come home, take a nap, go to my dentist appointment, come home, and go to bed.

I'm not all that sure that being a bar-person is perhaps the best job for a student to have, especially when there's only 143 days left until graduation.

So...

Goodnight.

So, for the class I actually like, Queer Theory, we're reading a book by Riki Wilchins called Queer Theory, Gender Theory: An Instant Primer. It's a fascinating read, and a quick one too. I've almost finished it in just a couple short hours.

Anyway, the chapter on Gay Rights really got me to thinking. She explains how issues with gender is entwined with both Gay rights as well as feminism. Feminists in the beginning didn't want women calling themselves feminists if they were too masculine looking and acting, because they feared it would set the movement back. Which, in a way, is true. Conservatives of that era (and still today, really) weren't ready to accept that some women just are "butch" acting and prefer mens clothes, jobs, etc. So feminist groups in the early days ostracized butch or lesbian women for fear of that. By the same token, I see this in the gay community time and time again. Hell, even until recently I was the same way: the community shuns or disaproves of men who are fags - or, too effeminate, as well as lesbians who are dykes - too butch. Because at the time being, we're trying to impose upon the conservatives that "we're just like you" even at the cost of ostracizing a good part of our community - which includes transpeople and crossdressers. Is it really worth it? I mean, if we're throwing half of the cargo off the train - does it really matter where we're going or if we get there at all?

Something I'll be thinking about from now on, that's for sure.

Weee! I have the whole weekend to myself (is it sad that it depresses me because a weekend is only 2 days? *grr*). That means I can finally get some stuff done. I need to clean the apartment, desperately, including the bathroom *shudder*. Also need to go through my closet and clean it out. And then get caught up on all my reading for school (i'm already behind!). Take back some stuff to target and Marshall's. And go to Kohl's and see if they have anything in black. Do you know how hard it is to find clothes in all black that isn't dress slacks?

Speaking of all black. Last night was my first official night of "work" at Gentry. Went pretty well - didn't do quite as well in tips as I thought I would, which kind of sucked. But on the other hand, I made in 4 hours what I would make in a 10 hour shift catering. And I work Monday night, which should hopefully be not-bad; although Monday nights lately have been really bad. Ah well, it should all be well. At least it's cash in my pocket and a check in the bank, which is never not good.

So I should probably get started on the cleaning. Matt's coming over later and I think we're doing dinner out tonight. I feel the need to dance. Or at the very least, be out. The goal for the evening: not to spend everything I made last night.

*does a pretty good impression of a fish*

I just heard the Wicked soundtrack for the first time - up till now I'd only heard the Wizard and I and Defying Gravity (which are so not the best songs from the musical).

Now I'm bitter and angst-ridden.

Stupid musical. Poo.

I feel like I've been away a long time, or something. And I know I've been a crap LJ Friend the past couple of weeks.

( RL Ramble - I'll spare you. )

Do you ever feel like you just don't belong? Or that you're the punchline in some cosmic joke?

I hate school. I just want it to be over.

I've gotten a few emails, so I thought I'd drop a line and let everyone know that yes, I am still here. And yes, I'm still fine. Actually, oddly enough, I'm just as fine as I was before - perfectly happy and la-la-la.

You-know-who still hasn't decided whether or not he's going back. I told him I don't want him to go, though, but I understand if he has to. Which is true. I'll hurt a lot and miss him a lot, but it's nothing I haven't dealt with before.

So, school's back in session. Which means I'm busier than ever. My course load this quarter is turning out to be even heavier than last quarter - SKEERY! - so that means major decreasage of the LJ time. It also means no more weeknight visits to the bar, or late nights out with friends.

A Nun. I'm turning into a nun. God save us all.

Also? 6 months exactly until the end of the world. Fun, huh?

And for today's cosmic sarcasm, I give you my horoscope:

Quickie: Tell your problems to your friends -- someone has a good suggestion you should hear.
Overview: Has someone's presence in your life really made things much brighter and happier for you? If the answer's yes, you should definitely tell them. Not only will it brighten their day, you'll feel great for having said something.

Hee. Just got off the phone with Matt. He's finally home. He's mad that he missed New Years, and he feels guilty:) *muah*

We're meeting for drinks about 9 o'clock.

And - he says he missed me. *thud*