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Okay. I'm calm now.
I hate that. I had a bad day at work and came home and hopped in bed. Apparently I fell asleep, because i woke up at 7:30pm, and when i looked at the clock I freaked out thinking I was 3.5 hours late for work. It's just weird to sleep when there's light out and wake up at dark. My body goes "uh. what?" But now I don't know what to do. On a normal night I'd be slipping into the sheets, but right now I'm kinda wired and starving.
Rar. I can't wait to have a normal job where I don't keep such odd hours.
Rar. I can't wait to have a normal job where I don't keep such odd hours.
I heard on the news that Indiana does not change time coming up here on DST. Which makes no sense. We're on East Coast time right now. If we don't fall back with east cost, we'll be an hour ahead of them and TWO hours ahead of my parents. WHAT? I just wanna know - does Indy change time or not?
First of all - Stephanie Weaver, a girl I went to school with from Pre-k through senior graduation, also a girl that I had an on and off again "i can't stand her" attitude towards just friended me out of the blue on myspace. She brought along with her an invite to our 5 year high school reunion. *cringe* Is it time for that already? Don't people know that it's just an event sponsored by the popular kids no one really liked but secretly wanted to be, so that they can see and show how much better than everyone else their lives are? Also? Just...no. *shiver* Only if a few of my old teachers were going would I ever think about it.
Funny the things that get us as we get older. There was a time when I didn't balance my checkbook and would not worry about it, but check my balance every day. Come the end of the week, I'd be horrified to find out that I didn't have enough to go out or buy that new sweater.
This morning I'm balancing my checkbook and have a heart attack when i discover that I'm overdrawn by literally hundreds of dollars, and I still need to pay rent, which is due today! Wrong. I forgot, I got paid last week, paid rent and all my bills a week early, and have quite a bit left over for living stuff. It's just that the reciepts were out of order as I was balancing them.
Ah, being growed-up. Fun, yes?
And now, to finish watching Friday the 13th, which I am watching for the very first time. shut up
This morning I'm balancing my checkbook and have a heart attack when i discover that I'm overdrawn by literally hundreds of dollars, and I still need to pay rent, which is due today! Wrong. I forgot, I got paid last week, paid rent and all my bills a week early, and have quite a bit left over for living stuff. It's just that the reciepts were out of order as I was balancing them.
Ah, being growed-up. Fun, yes?
And now, to finish watching Friday the 13th, which I am watching for the very first time. shut up
I just went to get dressed and put on a wifebeater only to find it's too small. It's one of his. Now I feel dirty. You know, in a bad way.
Hmm. Felt pretty good to throw it in the trash, though.
Hmm. Felt pretty good to throw it in the trash, though.
Wow, yesterday was a really awesome day. Today, I just want to kill someone. Particularily, I would like to commit neighbor-cide. Why can't people understand that just because it's the middle of the day doesn't mean that people upstairs aren't trying to sleep. That some people have jobs. That some people aren't punk asses? I've been pretty nice up to this point. But from now on in the morning when I'm getting ready for work at 2/3 in the morning, the speakers are getting cranked. And trust me, Phantom at full volume plus bass - (not to mention me singing along) it's not pretty. I almost can't wait for Friday morning when i get ready for work. Any suggestions on what I should compile for my playlist? Fuckers. Fuck that.
Totally threw Biff for a loop today. He asked me something and I accidentally called him Biff. I quickly appologized, but everyone was already cracking up. Later he cornered me with the "what is your problem?" question. I calmly and rationally told him that it's not him I dislike, it's that he should never have been hired into the position, and that I'm just a little bit bitter about having to do everything, still, and babysit him. He didn't really like my answer. Well, don't ask me a question. Everyone should know that by now. I mean, honestly. That's just silly. Oh well, I got to vent my frustration when I did the destroys. Did you know that plastic chairs explode like glass when you slam down a sledge hammer with your full stregnth on them? Fun times.
And now I'm headed over to Justin & Cari's. Gonna do a couple loads of (free!) laundry and be the official candy-giver while they take Cass out for tricks-for-treats. [i heard her call me Uncle Brad yesterday for the first time...I melted]. Then it's a horror-a-thon (no, not whore-a-thon, which is a completely different type of evening) full of classic bloody gorry goodness. I still can't believe it's already Halloween.
Happy Hallows, all!
Totally threw Biff for a loop today. He asked me something and I accidentally called him Biff. I quickly appologized, but everyone was already cracking up. Later he cornered me with the "what is your problem?" question. I calmly and rationally told him that it's not him I dislike, it's that he should never have been hired into the position, and that I'm just a little bit bitter about having to do everything, still, and babysit him. He didn't really like my answer. Well, don't ask me a question. Everyone should know that by now. I mean, honestly. That's just silly. Oh well, I got to vent my frustration when I did the destroys. Did you know that plastic chairs explode like glass when you slam down a sledge hammer with your full stregnth on them? Fun times.
And now I'm headed over to Justin & Cari's. Gonna do a couple loads of (free!) laundry and be the official candy-giver while they take Cass out for tricks-for-treats. [i heard her call me Uncle Brad yesterday for the first time...I melted]. Then it's a horror-a-thon (no, not whore-a-thon, which is a completely different type of evening) full of classic bloody gorry goodness. I still can't believe it's already Halloween.
Happy Hallows, all!
Dinner is served: Sauteed mushrooms in a sweet onion marinade on a bed of wheat rigatoni with a homemade red sauce.
I'm excited - how bout you?
Also? I think I'm getting the hang of this cooking for one thing.
I'm excited - how bout you?
Also? I think I'm getting the hang of this cooking for one thing.
Um. Hi, I'm four.
Me and the new guy (aka the new boss, aka "Biff" a la Back to the Future) are officially in pre-rumble mode cue West Side OfficeMax theme song here. I think our main issue is that I think he's a giant stupid brutish inbred moron who should have never been hired. He, aparrently, disagrees. We actually had a 30 minute argument this morning over how to break down boxes. True story. Of course I won because, well, I'm me. And also because I'm right. He just makes it so easy to sink to pre-K "Nuh uh!" syndrome. And it's not even that he's ignorant - he has a MA in education for crying out loud. It's just that if I have to answer one more question that he should know the answer to (or not...isn't it great when they bring people off the street?), I think I might staple his tongue to his eyelid - just a thought.
Otherwise, today is a happy day. My mind is clear for a moment, and my body is relax mode. I think I finally overloaded myself thinking too much, which is actually a perty darn nice feeling. Stress, be gone.
Me and the new guy (aka the new boss, aka "Biff" a la Back to the Future) are officially in pre-rumble mode cue West Side OfficeMax theme song here. I think our main issue is that I think he's a giant stupid brutish inbred moron who should have never been hired. He, aparrently, disagrees. We actually had a 30 minute argument this morning over how to break down boxes. True story. Of course I won because, well, I'm me. And also because I'm right. He just makes it so easy to sink to pre-K "Nuh uh!" syndrome. And it's not even that he's ignorant - he has a MA in education for crying out loud. It's just that if I have to answer one more question that he should know the answer to (or not...isn't it great when they bring people off the street?), I think I might staple his tongue to his eyelid - just a thought.
Otherwise, today is a happy day. My mind is clear for a moment, and my body is relax mode. I think I finally overloaded myself thinking too much, which is actually a perty darn nice feeling. Stress, be gone.
Crackling static dribbles from the stereo speakers;
the crashing wind screams and freezes through the cracked window
as I slice through the night on burning rubber.
The lights of the city glow like embers against the twilight sky behind me.
My slick palms grip the wheel, knuckles white and aching.
Every piece of me is throbbing, exhaling, humming, singing.
Laughter is pressed against my lips,
my tongue rolling against my teeth in a silent grin.
I cannot keep still the thoughts and fantasies that hopscotch through my mind,
the daydreams and longings that pierce this newly unlocked vault that is my heart,
my soul.
Even as my shoe mashes the iron pedal against the synthetic floor
I feel myself drifting, floating, sailing slowly and steadily
towards a place I feel safe, towards a place I feel normal again.
To you.
This is but one memory of a thousand
which would that I could be rid of.
Only one of a thousand sleepless nights remembering rememberings
which I only wish to forget.
the crashing wind screams and freezes through the cracked window
as I slice through the night on burning rubber.
The lights of the city glow like embers against the twilight sky behind me.
My slick palms grip the wheel, knuckles white and aching.
Every piece of me is throbbing, exhaling, humming, singing.
Laughter is pressed against my lips,
my tongue rolling against my teeth in a silent grin.
I cannot keep still the thoughts and fantasies that hopscotch through my mind,
the daydreams and longings that pierce this newly unlocked vault that is my heart,
my soul.
Even as my shoe mashes the iron pedal against the synthetic floor
I feel myself drifting, floating, sailing slowly and steadily
towards a place I feel safe, towards a place I feel normal again.
To you.
This is but one memory of a thousand
which would that I could be rid of.
Only one of a thousand sleepless nights remembering rememberings
which I only wish to forget.
So last night was a hoot and a half. I sang (horribly), I danced (whorely), met some new friends. It was just what the doctor ordered to blow off some steam. Justin & Cari know some good people, that's for sure.
I heart this movie.
Mom's going in for an MRI tomorrow night, then the biopsy's been scheduled for the 7th. She still hasn't decided what she's going to do yet. I think i'm going to hold off on any emotional response until she gets the results.
I heart this movie.
Mom's going in for an MRI tomorrow night, then the biopsy's been scheduled for the 7th. She still hasn't decided what she's going to do yet. I think i'm going to hold off on any emotional response until she gets the results.
Four different people just texted me asking me to come out tonight, and two of them told me to come in costume. For the life of me, I could not understand why.
Right. halloween.
When the hell did it get to be halloween? Where did this year go?
Right. halloween.
When the hell did it get to be halloween? Where did this year go?
We have to design our own business cards at work for training on the new design center order system, and we get 100 prints of whatever we design. I thought hey, if I'm going to have business cards, why not put them to use and use them as mini-resumes (I'm actually going to have the link to my resume webpage on the back, so that's kind of nifty)?
The problem is that I can't decide on which one to use. I created 7 designs, and I'm not sure which I like best. Could you take a look and let me know which you like? If you have any suggestions, I'll definetely appreciate them as well!
( Cards behind the cut (7 images, smallish) )
The problem is that I can't decide on which one to use. I created 7 designs, and I'm not sure which I like best. Could you take a look and let me know which you like? If you have any suggestions, I'll definetely appreciate them as well!
( Cards behind the cut (7 images, smallish) )
boo. work stucks.
I think today is an "eternal sunshine of the spotless mind" day. i haven't watched that since i moved, and i think i need to correct that.
yay, tonight! going out, me and cari are heading for kareokee and our respective poisons. sounds like fun to me.
but first, i nap.
I think today is an "eternal sunshine of the spotless mind" day. i haven't watched that since i moved, and i think i need to correct that.
yay, tonight! going out, me and cari are heading for kareokee and our respective poisons. sounds like fun to me.
but first, i nap.
I'm in much better spirits today. In a weird way, I think last night has a lot to do with it. It really helps knowing I was wanted, that someone found me desirable and interesting. I've not really felt that way since Frank. Not that I'm going back to my old tricks, but for the first time in a LONG time, I felt that. Attractive.
I'm not ready to deal with the mom situation. I just, can't. Not right now. I have this irrational idea that if I avoid all contact with home, that it's not happening. That if I don't hear it, about it, it just doesn't exist. In no way is this healthy, I know that. But just for a little while. I mean...it's my mom.
Now I'm going to spend the afternoon watching SPN, try writing, and getting caught up on some much needed sleep.
I leave you with this: an SPN angst!vid I found set to my new favorite song by my new favorite band.
I'm not ready to deal with the mom situation. I just, can't. Not right now. I have this irrational idea that if I avoid all contact with home, that it's not happening. That if I don't hear it, about it, it just doesn't exist. In no way is this healthy, I know that. But just for a little while. I mean...it's my mom.
Now I'm going to spend the afternoon watching SPN, try writing, and getting caught up on some much needed sleep.
I leave you with this: an SPN angst!vid I found set to my new favorite song by my new favorite band.
I'm in love.
With a new (to me) band. Poets of the Fall. They're just damn good. And their videos are so pretty. Like, whoa.
With a new (to me) band. Poets of the Fall. They're just damn good. And their videos are so pretty. Like, whoa.
I really have this incredible urge to just pack up my car with a few changes of clothes and just keep driving until I can't anymore.
.
