okay, I'm late for a study group meeting, but I wanted to breeze by and say 'ello' after posting L2bL.

i know i'm ignoring LJ right now, but a bunch of shit is going on and i really just don't have time for anything at the moment. it's getting bad enough that i almost have to pencil in showering to my schedules.

i'll get to emails and comments and whatnot hopefully friday.

i'm not dead!

Okay, so today was my first day (and by day I mean my first class, roughly 1.5 hours. heh). My class this morning was Statistics II. I definetely don't want to jinx myself or anything, but I'm thinking this will be my easier class! a)we covered all of this stuff in Research II last year - the sylabus looks exactly the same - so I've got the notes, handouts, and quizes to majorly help me out if I get stuck. b)she gives us the lecture notes, so we don't even have to take notes. I was worried about this class being the hardest, and it looks like it's just going to be a review class for me.

I just turned in my independent study stuff, and it turns out that I can take it as my experiential. For any DePaul people, you know what that means - *whoot*.

I got to see a bunch of friends that I haven't for a really long time, which makes me uber happy.

so now for home and lunch!

Hey everyone. I'm updating Learn to be Lonely today with Chapter 9 and a note about future updates. As some of you know, I start back to school tomorrow. It's my last year, and I'm taking a pretty heavy course load (20 hours), which means all my attention needs to be focused there. What that means in regards to L2bL or any other possible fics is that I'm not going to be able to update as frequently or regularily as I'd like. I'm not going to put this on hiatus, because I am still working on it and I don't want to abandon it, but I want you to know chapters will probably be few and far between, and to hang in there with me and I'll try and update when I can.

That said, on with the chapter!

Title: Learn to be Lonely Chapter 9/?
Author: chocgood84
Rating: NC-17 for brief violence and sexual content
Pairing: BtVS Spike/Xander
Author’s Note: Yes, I am aware that the timeline is a little screwed up and that Giles didn’t own the Magic Box until after Adam and after Dawn arrived. But in my reality, who’s Dawn? Adam what? Also, a huge spanking thanks to kitty_poker1 for being my official L2BL beta.
Disclaimer: These character’s aren’t mine, never were; I don’t get any profit for this hobby, so don’t sue – Thanks.
Warning: Brief violence, nudity, and hetero and homo sexual content and situations. And some h0t man-luvin.
Previous parts can be found here.

( Chapter 9 )

God I love the end of summer. Perhaps because it's my least favorite season, or because it means people are out like crazy, or because it means it's finally safe to go out of your house without fear of being run over by a roller blader. Anyway, this weekend is Labor Day weekend which means it's the kick off for another school year (my last one!), the cue for the sun to turn down it's dial, and that it's *almost* time to break out my autumn wardrobe, which as always has be ecstatic.

Aside from that, though, I think it's really neat to see how my school's campus has blossomed. Last week at this time of day, I saw three other people in here. Today, I could hardly find a place to sit. Not that I'm happy about *that* because let's face it - I'm not the most patient person in the world. But just because the place doesn't seem so deserted and lonely. Hrmm...projection much?

Anyway, I'm about to take off. Need to go home and make some lunch. Then it's me being in a cleaning frenzy. I'm cleaning out my CDs and getting rid of what I don't like anymore. Then it's me hitting the closet. Some of this stuff has *got* to go. I mean, honestly. I'm even making myself get rid of *gasp* a pair of shoes. Well, we'll see how that goes, yeah? And then it's tackling the bathroom because, hello, guy here. Or more accurately, a gay guy. I've got the products and messiness of a girl, and the somewhat-grossness of a guy. It's hybrid messiness. No good. I also need to get my desk and files organized, go through my cupboards and movies and clean out some stuff. That's right, folks. Fall cleaning is here. *squee*

*ahem*

We'll see how much actually gets done before I get bored and give up, giving in to the urge to watch Golden Girls.

So, just got an email from Dr. Cleland, the prof. that's sponsering and advising my research study. He's working on another project at the moment, and he wanted to know if I could help. As in - he specifically asked *me* to help. It's only about 10 hours, paying $10 an hour, but hey! That's research experience to add to my portfolio. It's also another hundred bucks that could potentially help claw myself out of the poor house. And really? Brad's a happier camper (any gay jokes and I'll have to hurt someone) when he's got some money to burn and all of his bills paid. Yes, yes he is.

As for the other thing, the post from yesterday, I was just reading it and damned if I don't sound like a lifetime movie. I'm suprisingly not that upset over it. Just, ironically, suprised. So don't anyone be all sad for me, because if anything this helps me. I was thinking about it last night, and I realized that despite all of that which I didn't know, I've still lived the last two years to the best of my ability, and I've grown because of it. Knowing the truth doesn't make any of that less real. So in the end, yeah I kinda got the raw deal, but I'm better off for it. And there endeth the lesson (guess who's been watching S7 again?). That's all I really have to say about him, the situation, or any of the events surrounding it.

Front page news today is that I start school in a week, and I'm way overexcited. I got all giddy the other day while I was going through and tabbing and organizing my binders and files and bookshelves getting everythign ready. I bought a few of my books already, and I've nearly finished one of the history ones (Black Death: The Great Mortality of 1348-1350 by John Alberth). I'm really kind of psyched about my Medieval people class. Except for one thing: for whatever reason, when remembering how much I liked my Middle Ages class in high school, I completely forgot that at least 60% of the events in the Middle Ages happened to be about the Rise of Christianity. Which I could happily live the rest of my life and never hear about it again. Ah well - at least I'm primed for it.

And today's back story is: I'm fucking tired. I couldn't sleep last night (go figure, with all that on my mind) and I finally dozed off around 4ish. I had to be up at 6 to get ready for work. My body is temporarily fucked up because Sunday I didn't go to bed until the sun was coming up, and today I had to get up while it was still dark out. So right now, I'm going home to collapse on the bed and not move again until I have to go to work tomorrow afternoon. Have I mentioned that I'm trying to make as much money as possible?

Oh. My. God.

I'm about to start my LAST year of college.

I graduate in 9 months.

I'm going to be DONE with school.

I'm a senior.

I'm almost done.

EEP!

1. Yesterday afternoon, I finally called the video store to see what was up with the job. Jason told me they decided to promote from within, and that I didn't get it - sorry. So, I thanked him, hung up, and curled into a ball and sobbed for about 10 minutes. Not because I didn't get the job, but because of everything that's been happening. Then the phone rang - it was the catering company. They booked me for 12 days in september, with the promise of another 10 coming in the next couple of weeks. And they're all said to be at least 10 hour shifts. You do the math - 12 x 10 x $13 an hour. Basically, I'll be able to make rent, pay bills, and put some money away for a rainy day next month. Sooooo happy, and now I feel 100% better.

2. Picked up my paycheck today - turned out to be $150 more than I thought it was. Which means I can make rent *this* month, too. *whoot*

3. Did my Tarot last night - lets just say that there are good times a-coming.

4. I'm so excited that everyone's liking L2bL - it makes me happy. Although it also makes me giggle that there are so many speculations on what is coming next:)

5. Basically, I'm feeling a lot better than I have in a long time. So...*huge big hugs for everyone*

So, I'm actually in a good mood today. I went to check the mail today, and along with the new power cord for my lappy, there's an evelope from my mum. Inside was a check! *whoot* It looks like I'm going to be able to make rent afterall *knock on wood*. Not all that sure how I'm going to pay bills, but hey, at least I won't be homeless *knock on wood again*. It's amazing how much better that makes me feel. Whoever said money can't buy happiness obviously wasn't a poor schlub like me.

Also, now that I have my lappy back in working condition, Lean to be Lonely is going be getting back on track. And there may even be a new other suprise coming up soon - more on that at a later date.

In other news, G took me to see Skeleton Key the other night - absolutely fantastic. It's got my two thumbs up. Last night we rented Hide and Seek, and suprisingly I did like it (I'm in no way shape or form anything resembling a DeNiro fan - he bugs the hell out of me). I didn't think it was all that scary, but I liked it. About the creepiest thing in that movie was the little girl, though. That's the stuff that makes me not want children. *cringe* Two words, though? Pooooor kitty.

As for the nightmares? Still having them. Last night I dreamt I was a bottle of champage, and someone popped my head off like a cork. It shot around the room bouncing off walls and a couple chandeliers before finally landing in someone's crue de te. And the other night when I stayed ad G's, I was sleeping on the couch and she was on the floor. Apparently I was thrashing around and making wierd sounds enough that she had to get up and go in her room and shut the door. Seriously? I think I might be losing my mind. Where's a good free therapist when you need one, eh?

Anyway, I'm gonna scoot. Still got some stuff to take care of here, and then I'm headed home to figure out something for dinner. I'm thinking leftovers. I've got half a garlic-lover's pizza from Chicago's, two pork chops, half a meat loaf, and some sauteed fruit. Hrmm...Meetloaf and pizza? Hell yeah. And then it's going to be settling down for the night to read some more of and hopefully finish 1984 (which I'll so be commenting on once I finish). I promise, tomorrow I'll work on getting some more of L2bL up and responding to comments/emails. I hope.