synapticjava: (Default)
2009-05-01 07:03 pm
Entry tags:

Web Hosting

Alright, so as most of you know, Geocities will be closing down here, shortly. And, as a few of those most may know, that's where my site is hosted. Original fic, fanfic, everything. I don't want to just archive my fic, I want my whole site somewhere else. So my question, to those in the know:

Is there any other service out there that any of you webmasters use or know of that can replace Geocities? My budget is, well, not. But any info you have would be much appreciated.
synapticjava: (Default)
2009-05-01 05:49 pm

Boo

I tried something new with dinner tonight.

It bombed. Looks like it's PB & J tonight. Yuck.

Wine's good, though ;)
synapticjava: (Default)
2009-05-01 05:49 pm

Boo

I tried something new with dinner tonight.

It bombed. Looks like it's PB & J tonight. Yuck.

Wine's good, though ;)
synapticjava: (Default)
2009-05-01 03:27 pm
Entry tags:

Carpet lines!

I'm aware that this makes me sound craziery, but I just love it when there are lines in the carpet after a rigorous vacuuming. It makes me feel clean. *cleanly sigh*

I've made pretty good progress today. All that is left is the office *shudder* and bouncing checks paying bills *worse shudder*. I should probably go ahead and order Mom's Day flowers too. Hurrah, another holiday to bleed my wallet. Not that they don't deserve it. And I still need to finish up this chapter of L2bL and send it off.

All in all, a nice way to spend my day off on this cold and stormy day (LOVE IT!).

Also, I've discovered I like orange juice now. Go figure.

Also, also: to my SPN peeps, EEGADS!
synapticjava: (Default)
2009-05-01 03:27 pm
Entry tags:

Carpet lines!

I'm aware that this makes me sound craziery, but I just love it when there are lines in the carpet after a rigorous vacuuming. It makes me feel clean. *cleanly sigh*

I've made pretty good progress today. All that is left is the office *shudder* and bouncing checks paying bills *worse shudder*. I should probably go ahead and order Mom's Day flowers too. Hurrah, another holiday to bleed my wallet. Not that they don't deserve it. And I still need to finish up this chapter of L2bL and send it off.

All in all, a nice way to spend my day off on this cold and stormy day (LOVE IT!).

Also, I've discovered I like orange juice now. Go figure.

Also, also: to my SPN peeps, EEGADS!
synapticjava: (Default)
2009-05-01 01:35 am

Dreamwidth

Hmmmm. It's pretty new and shiny. Very very LJ-esq, but with a few different features. I'll have to play around for a bit and try and get the hang of it. I definitely won't be abandoning my livejournal, that's for sure.

btw, I'm synapticjava here in land 'o dream.
synapticjava: (Default)
2009-05-01 01:35 am

Dreamwidth

Hmmmm. It's pretty new and shiny. Very very LJ-esq, but with a few different features. I'll have to play around for a bit and try and get the hang of it. I definitely won't be abandoning my livejournal, that's for sure.

btw, I'm synapticjava here in land 'o dream.
synapticjava: (pictures of you)
2009-04-30 10:56 pm
Entry tags:

I guess we'll pack the ghosts as well and move on now

So far, I've gone through the entrance hutch cabinet (yick), the tool/junk drawer, the dining room closet, the cupboards above the refridgerator and under the sink, the bathroom closet, and my bedroom closet. I've still got plenty left to do, I haven't even stepped foot in the office yet. I've gotten a few boxes and bags of garbage and recycleables. I've also got one or two boxes of "not ready to get rid of yet." It's really odd, as I'm going through everything I'm coming across a ton of stuff from Tom from when we first got together. Ticket stubs and little letters and notes and the general accumulation of a relationship. They're going into the "not yet" box, but I'm not finding it as difficult to go through this stuff as I thought it would be. It actually feels kind of cathartic, like I'm putting that away where it should be. It just feels right to be packing it away. Keeping the things that meant and mean so much to me, but get it out of my everyday. Funny that I should be finally doing this with my birthday next week.

I feel like I"m turning towards better things, more productive things. We had a wonderful relationship, and if nothing else I was able to know what that felt like for a little while. So I should be happy that I got to experience it, and be thankful for that. And I am. And now, though my thoughts still drift to it, it's time to put it away and focus on things in front of me. I feel like closure is setting in.

I've decided to try for the Case Worker position at the new County Corrections building opening in a few weeks. It's exactly what I want to do, something I'm perfectly qualified for, and I think it's the right track. I'm up against 200 other applicants, but I think I can do it.

And now I think I'll sip my latte and enjoy the Rachel Maddow Show before settling down to write some more.
synapticjava: (wha?)
2009-04-30 12:06 am

Erm

Might have just signed up for a twitter account.

*headesk*
synapticjava: (Default)
2009-04-28 09:16 pm

Picture of Dorian Gray

So far, quotes I love:

"Poets are not so scrupulous as you are.  They know how useful passion is for publication.  Nowadays a broken heart will run to many editions."

"Oh, brothers!  I don't care for brothers.  My elder brother won't die, and my younger brothers seem never to do anything else."

"Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far the best ending for one."


I'm enjoying this book.  Yay for google books while I'm stuck monitoring phone calls and showers.
synapticjava: (america)
2009-04-27 12:21 pm

Do you people even know about this whole Constitution thing?

At work, once a month, we have a church group that comes in with snacks and a video for the kids, they do a devotional, a big group prayer, and a little lesson for them to think about. Now, as severly NON-Religious as I am, I usually spend that night keeping busy and trying to be not in the room at all. Not only do I vehemently disagree with everything they say, etc, but I also have a little thing I like to call respect. I respect them for believing what they believe, and while I do not agree with it, everyone is allowed and entitled to their own belief. I also am of the opinion that if a person doesn't believe in specific religious events and ideals, it is much more respectful to exclude yourself from said events and ideals so as not to be rude. It's also a little issue I have with hypocracy - how can you be against something and then participate in it? Anyway, my only real major problem with this is that it is not an option for the kids. We force them, under penalty of a write-up, to participate, or at the very least join the group. I understand the reasoning, I really do - that by social interaction and trying to get the kids to understand the importance of so-called "brotherhood" and religion in one's life, that maybe they'll spark something and a few of them will think "hey, wait a minute, I can get back on the right track." The logic to me is backward, a little, but I digress.

I just recieved an email from my supervisor kindly letting me know that we'll be having other church groups come in, for a minimum of three "church nights" a week. And I am outraged. I don't think that I would be so angry if they were having multiple religions represented, say, Christianity, Judiasm, and Islam just because they're the Big Three. Because at least then I could support the idea that we're trying to expose these kids to so-called "positive" influences, in spades. But by representing only one viewpoint and perspective on religion, and if you so believe - "God", we are showing them two huge points: One, that there is ONLY one "good" or "real" religion out there and if you don't believe it, you're wrong (and yes, I am aware that out of the Big Three, all three believe they are the only "good" and "real" religion - IRONY), which is simply not true. And number Two: This one religion may be the only way you will ever get out of jail and stay out of jail which is also not true. Now, putting aside my personal vehement dislike of anything claiming it is "the will of God," my overall concern here is that by doing this we are further narrowing minds that are otherwise already warped and narrowed from a life of abuse, neglect, general bad-parenting, and extremely poor moral standing. You do not have to believe in religion or God to be a moral person. It worries me that this is what we are telling them.

And even standing outside of the control that Christianity has over America, we are supposed to be protected from this. I am supposed to be protected as a Citizen and as an employee. The kids are supposed to protected while they are in the custody of the State. We all are supposed to be shielded from the glaring eyes and powerful fists of any church - it was the main objective of creating this country. We are a nation of equals and your God is not better than my God (or non-God) under the laws that govern us. Why are we allowing our goverment to impose religion on us, in any sense? And why aren't more people angry about this same sort of situation - it is everywhere! I may have been one of a handful of people who celebrated when the courts said children were no longer forced to pledge their allegiegance to God. Don't they understand by forcing me to administer this belief, and by forcing the kids to participate in this belief, they are breaking the law?

I'm probably a little overboard on this, but this is one of my biggest issues with, well, Life. At work, I am literally the only person working there who is not a "believer" and there have been comments made. For instance, last night when my Supervisor first broke the subject to me, letting me know she was thinking about this, I told her how I felt about it. She rolled her eyes and said "well no one your age likes church..." which is insulting and demeaning, first of all. But then when I explained to her it wasn't about church, that I do not believe in her religion - or any other - she just laughed and said "Oh, one of those," ending the conversation and walking away as if my thougths and ideas were nothing. Do not dismiss me. My non-belief is every bit as vaild as anyones belief. These are my civil liberties, and I'll be damned if anyone that isn't named George W. Bush tries to take them away.
synapticjava: (hideyourskin)
2009-04-26 12:26 pm

Day two

Um, is it normal to feel like your skin is itching right off your body?
synapticjava: (L2BL)
2009-04-26 11:36 am
Entry tags:

Learn to be Lonely Chapter 30

Title: Learn to be Lonely Chapter 30/?
Author: [livejournal.com profile] chocgood84
Rating: NC-17 for brief violence and sexual content
Pairing: BtVS Spike/Xander
Author’s Note: Yes, I am aware that the timeline is a little screwed up and that Giles didn’t own the Magic Box until after Adam and after Dawn arrived. But in my reality, who’s Dawn? Adam what? Also, a huge spanking thanks to [livejournal.com profile] kitty_poker1 for still agreeing to be my official L2BL beta, even after so much time has passed.
Disclaimer: These character’s aren’t mine, never were; I don’t get any profit for this hobby, so don’t sue – Thanks.
Warning: Brief violence, nudity, and hetero and homo sexual content and situations. And some h0t man-luvin.
This can also be found in my LJ Memories, as well as on my revamped website: Forget It.


Learn to be Lonely


synapticjava: (devine inspiration)
2009-04-25 12:01 pm
Entry tags:

100 Challenging things a boy could do

Back to work today. I'm not all that excited about it. I'll have to pass meds on my first shift back after training with no one to help me. I should mention that if you mess up on meds you're immediately terminated, do not pass GET THE FUCK OUT, do not collect unemployment. So I'm a teeny tiny wittle bit nervous. There won't even be another trained person there tonight to ask questions. In my unit it's me and a part timer and in the other unit it's an untrained full timer and part timer, and with Secure Housing giving me the UBER silent treatment, I'll have to pass meds in both units. EEP.

OTOH, it's Saturday which is historically the most stressless day of the week. No programming or school, limited visitation, usually only a few home passes. The only downside is that a bad Saturday is a bad day. One week we had 5 visits, 2 psych evals, and 4 home passes and appointments. It was a nightmare. *please don't let today be that day* And unless our numbers jumped back up, we should only have about 8 kids. Much easier to deal with than the 14 we had on Monday. *shudders* It seems the county is trying for the catch and release program, tagging all the minors and releasing them back into the wild.

I think I'll take Serenity in and make the kids watch it. If I have to watch one more Adam Sandler movie I might stable my forehead. You know, just for funsies.
synapticjava: (oh honey no!)
2009-04-25 11:12 am

Twenty-Four

Alrighty. It's officially been 24 hours, one full DAY since my last cigarette. I made it one full day so far.

This is all hard 'n stuff.
synapticjava: (politics)
2009-04-24 10:10 pm

I think i just pissed myself.

First of all, did you know about this? How awesome! I've already stocked my "library" with tons of stuff I've been wanting to read.

Also - I may be busy watching these for days. This one, in particular, made me laugh ice cream out of my nose. No, really. Thank you, Rachel Maddow. If you've not heard of her or had a chance to catch her show, do yourself a favor and download a podcast and take a gander. Best news show host ever!
synapticjava: (spinning race)
2009-04-23 02:33 pm

All the races you lost, all the love lists that cost you the heart on your sleeve ...

Crisis is seemingly adverted for now. Today is a new day, and it's shaping up to be a good one so far. Training this morning went well, and the nurse (this was medical training) teaching the course said I did better than most at their first class. And this is the nurse I've always suspected hated me. Turns out she's just a little rough around the edges. Anyway I was pretty happy with that.

Then on the way home I stopped off and picked up some stuff to change the apartment a little. Some new shelves and pillows for the living room, a cabinet for the bathroom, and mucho cleaning supplies because here in a bit I'm going on a scrubbing spree. Taking down some of the stupid reminders and making it mine all over again seems to help. And cleaning always makes me feel better.

So I've managed to bring it back a little and after practicing some meditation excersises I researched this morning before training, I'm feeling a lot calmer. My problem, it seems, is that I still let things sneak up and then overwhelm me. For all of you not-crazy people out there - how do you do that?
synapticjava: (lost my shoe)
2009-04-23 12:20 am

I've tarnished all our memories but there'll always be a trace of you...

Well, I sure did it. Against my (and countless others') better judgement, I decided to suck it up and go to Justin & Cari's for dinner tonight afterall. I thought, in the end, it would be good for me and a right step in the getting-back-to-me zone. I was wrong. )
I wound up buying another pack of cigarettes on the way home and I've smoked about half of it, one after the other. I just flushed what was left. Today didn't go so well, but tomorrow's another day.
synapticjava: (fuck off)
2009-04-22 12:49 pm

Fan-fricking tastic

Justin and Cari invited me to dinner tonight a few days ago because we never get to hang out outside of work anymore, and we all happened to have today off. I was pretty excited about it.

Cari just texted me saying Brent and Jen are coming too. I like them, they're good friends. But they're a sickeningly sweet new couple. I suddently just became the fifth wheel on a couple's night.

I don't want to be rude and cancel at the last minute, but I really don't think I'm emotionally equipped for that. So, looks like my day off has just become battle of the brain ninjas.

Yeah...bad mood hasn't passed yet.