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This song makes me sad and want to cry really hard. Thank's ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
nightsashke, thank's so much. It's so pretty. I cannot wait until his album comes out. I think I'll preorder it. It makes me think about Chris though. Don't worry, it's not "oh my god i miss him so much and i wanna die without him", just kind of "I miss having someone around who truly cares about me." With everything that's been going on, I've really been kind of doubting a lot of things in my life, er, rather, reprioritizing. I want love. I want someone to love. But I don't want it. I don't know, I can't explain it. I know someday it will happen again and it will be wonderful, but I'm lonely now. Even just a really close friend who will lay with me and listen to me and think about me.
Man, winter bites. It's so bitterly cold. I don't think I'll ever be warm again.
I need to be hugged. I feel like I'm floating.
I should sleep, er rather, get into bed and pray I'll be able to sleep. Last night, the little sleep I did get was plagued by the weirdest freaking dreams. Naturally i don't remember what happened, but I remember that they were weird.
I really wanna go away for a while. Maybe it's not winter, but Barat, that depresses the hell out of me, and almost everyone else. Well, okay, depresses isn't the right word because I've been feeling so happy the last couple of weeks (even if stressed) but today I just feel so...blah, ya know? I don't wanna get out of bed, I don't wanna do anything. I just want to sleep. Maybe if I didn't have such a problem with talking to psychologists (ironic isn't it, considering that's what I want to do?), I'd go and talk to one of the interns. But I think I can handle it. I'm just at a low point. Gotta surf the beach until a high tide comes in, right? Right.
Ah, crap. My one-on-one with Dan is tomorrow. Doublecrap, BGLTS open house is tomorrow. Triplecrap...well okay, there is no reason for the tripplecrap, just felt like saying it. Problem? Think not. Hmm, maybe Friday night after work, I'll make G buy me some liquer. That'll take my mind off a few things for a little while. Hmm, maybe Shawna was right; I am a potential alchoholic. *shrugs* Sometimes it's almost more appealing. Bleck. man am I in a bad mood tonight.
nightsashke, thank's so much. It's so pretty. I cannot wait until his album comes out. I think I'll preorder it. It makes me think about Chris though. Don't worry, it's not "oh my god i miss him so much and i wanna die without him", just kind of "I miss having someone around who truly cares about me." With everything that's been going on, I've really been kind of doubting a lot of things in my life, er, rather, reprioritizing. I want love. I want someone to love. But I don't want it. I don't know, I can't explain it. I know someday it will happen again and it will be wonderful, but I'm lonely now. Even just a really close friend who will lay with me and listen to me and think about me.Man, winter bites. It's so bitterly cold. I don't think I'll ever be warm again.
I need to be hugged. I feel like I'm floating.
I should sleep, er rather, get into bed and pray I'll be able to sleep. Last night, the little sleep I did get was plagued by the weirdest freaking dreams. Naturally i don't remember what happened, but I remember that they were weird.
I really wanna go away for a while. Maybe it's not winter, but Barat, that depresses the hell out of me, and almost everyone else. Well, okay, depresses isn't the right word because I've been feeling so happy the last couple of weeks (even if stressed) but today I just feel so...blah, ya know? I don't wanna get out of bed, I don't wanna do anything. I just want to sleep. Maybe if I didn't have such a problem with talking to psychologists (ironic isn't it, considering that's what I want to do?), I'd go and talk to one of the interns. But I think I can handle it. I'm just at a low point. Gotta surf the beach until a high tide comes in, right? Right.
Ah, crap. My one-on-one with Dan is tomorrow. Doublecrap, BGLTS open house is tomorrow. Triplecrap...well okay, there is no reason for the tripplecrap, just felt like saying it. Problem? Think not. Hmm, maybe Friday night after work, I'll make G buy me some liquer. That'll take my mind off a few things for a little while. Hmm, maybe Shawna was right; I am a potential alchoholic. *shrugs* Sometimes it's almost more appealing. Bleck. man am I in a bad mood tonight.
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From:
no subject
that whole love thing...sometimes i think its all bullshit...but then i go...well, maybe...maybe?...hmmm who knows right? we all muddle through it.
btw...did you see a picture of that guy...he looks like 15?!
From:
Yeah
And yes, I did see his video. Very much 15ish!
From:
Re: Yeah
lol
I believe in the love too...the love It has to be real...I don't see much point in going on if it isn't. I also know love is a capricious mistress...or better yet...she's just a fucking bitch! heh...
I honestly think that I've loved...but never been loved in return (read: hearing Ewan McGregor in my head)...that's a bitter pill to swallow...but I also have come to the conclusion that maybe that's just my job here on this planet...to show love...and eventually...someday...there will be a guy who my dreams couldn't even have dreamed of...and he'll sweep me up...rescue me from the malaise...and we'll live happily ever after in our loft in manhattan...or our winter home in vail...or the quaint cottage in switzerland...or maybe the beach house in new zealand...but REGARDLESS...we'll have each other to hold at night...and I could give a fuck about anything else. :)
From:
Re: Yeah