GOOOOOOOOOD Morning, Viet - er, LJ Land

[synapticjava]

Hey, when's the last time *you* woke up in a great mood rip roaring and ready to go. Cuz I? Could take on an army of 4 year olds right now. *bounce* It's a beeeeyouteefull Saturday morning here on the north shore. The sun is shining, the last bit of snow is melting, and I haven't been in this good of a mood in what feels like forever.


You know, the past couple weeks we have been studying Existentialism in Counseling Theories. The basic premise of the theory is that we're all going to die. You can't hide from it or run from it or escape from it. Could die in five minutes, two days or twenty years. You just never know. So, knowing that you're going to die, why would want to waste precious time on stupid baggage and unhappy situations. We *always* have choices - inaction is a choice. Existentialism is all about freedom and responsibility - we have the freedom to choose our own path, we only have to be responisble for the consequences of those decisions.

So I made a decision - fuck it. I'm so sick and tired of being down and flipping out about everything (if you happen to remember last week's freak-out post) and worrying about too much and being stressed and miserable. Nope, no more. Well, a little stress is bound to happen - it's a human condition and actually a healthy reaction to modern society. What I'm talking about is going overboard. No more! I'm tired of it and it doesn't accomplish anything. I control my destiny and my environment and if I'm unhappy or stressed out I need to decide to make a change. Stress is my consequence of putting things off till the last minute and the consequence of not dealing with anything. So here it is. I'm deciding to get healthy and make a lifestyle change. No more weight-loss "goals" or expecting anything. I need to change the way that I eat and excercise. I need to change my outlook. I need to decide to move on from Chris (what, you didn't think he'd make an appearance here?). I've been letting myself dwindle over him for too long. I need to get on with my life and I'm making the decision that it's going to be a *good* one. Because only I can decide that. So I'm going to call him and tell him I'm coming for a visit and if he wants to get together - that's great. But if he doesn't, that's perfectly okay too. Because I get it now, I understand. And I'm leaving it behind.

You know it's funny - my favorite musical is RENT which is extremely centered around death and life. The whole theme of the show is "Forget Regret or life is your's to miss". It's always been one of my mottos, my advice for people. I think now I can actually believe it. I think now I can learn how to 'live'.



Well, that was so very "Dr. Phil" (man I hate that guy!)

And now my list for today involves:

• Cleaning like mad before I die of dust poisening


• Doing Laundry


• Do dishes


• Throw out *all* my junkfood and soda. Er, give it away because that would be wasteful.


• Finish three of my five articles summaries for Child Psych


• Do a rough draft of my roughdraft revision for Tuesday's Research Methods - do the final revision tomorrow


• Write my obituary for Counseling Theories


• Write my Egg summary for Counseling Theories


• Write my journal for Counseling Theories


• Give myself a manicure as a reward for not biting my nails for TWO WEEKS now!


• Perhaps get to Session Three of Kin to Sorrow (no promises)


• Get some more work done on the Sooper Seekrit Project


• Get the next part of Sunlight's plot pounded out for next week


• Work on my ficathon assignment - My Muse WILL cooperate


• Get in an hour at the gym


• Call Chris


• Oh, and *hug* you all!

And now to go play RENT and get started.

Comments

[trepkos.livejournal.com]

Hugs back.
Sounds like a good move, following in the footsteps of Sartre - can't go wrong!

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Heh. Yeah, Sartre and Johnathon Larson:)

[tabaqui]

*pet pet*
Glad you're feelin' so fine and frisky, bay-bee!
:)

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Thanks, bebe! *hugs*

[lunabee34.livejournal.com]

I know exactly how you feel. Why is it so liberating to realize that since we're all just gonna die anyway, we should take life by the balls and get what we want? It should be depressing, but it's not.

And Tori is my girlfriend (she just doesn't know it). My husband and I have a deal whereupon if Tori Amos ever asks me to marry her, I am so allowed, no harm no foul. :)

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

It should be depressing, but it's not.

You know, it's wierd - I've never been afraid of dying. I've never understood that fear. How can one fear something that's inevitable? Then again my faith is such that we don't cease to exist, we just aren't physical beings anymore.

*snerk* Tori - I used to HATE her music. There's still a few songs that make me wince when she starts the wailing screeching thing she does, but for the most part I really like her now.

You know - a lot of people I know have that same deal.

[lunabee34.livejournal.com]

"Then again my faith is such that we don't cease to exist, we just aren't physical beings anymore."

Well, you've hit the nail on the head there for me. I don't think I have any faith. It reallly disturbs me. I did when I was a teenager; not in anything specific. In fact, for most of my teenage years, I was an outright atheist; but I was on some kind of spiritual quest. You know how when you're in puberty and *everything* is so damn important. *g* I guess too much RL happened, and now my MO is just to ignore all spiritual questions and try to get what I want out of life without hurting too many people along the way.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

Well that's the thing, innit? Ever since I could think and act of my own free will, I've been unable to accept the idea of God or Gods or fate or destiny or anything. I still don't believe any of it. I guess I have more of a spiritual philosophy than a faith. And really, that's only lately that I've come to accept that.

[lunabee34.livejournal.com]

I think I believe in some sort of god or at least a force of goodness now. I can't look at my child and *not* believe that.

It seems to me that all the major world religions have the same rules. Don't kill people, etc. Maybe they're all different roads to the same place? I don't know.

I do know that I was raised crazy-ass right-wing Baptist, and part of me is terrified that I've got everything wrong, and Angelus's worst version of hell is in store for me. God, my therapist loves me. So many papers

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

It seems to me that all the major world religions have the same rules. Don't kill people, etc. Maybe they're all different roads to the same place? I don't know.

That's exactly my argument. I think it's ironic that every major (or even many smaller) religions in the world have the same basic beliefs and share the same basic goals - some heavenly afterlife. And yet every major religion sees only their own as the "right" religion and the "right" way to get into some glorious afterlife. I only wish that all the majore religions would *realize* this.

I was raised Baptist and then Evangelist. *cringe*

[lunabee34.livejournal.com]

Yeah, well, I wouldn't hold your breath waiting for everyone to skip hand in hand down the spiritual road to bliss. Apparently, we'd all just rather kill each other. Sigh....

If it's not too personal a question, I was wondering how your parents handle you being gay. I know firsthand that Protestants in general aren't overwhelming with their loving kindness towards homosexuals.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

If it's not too personal a question, I was wondering how your parents handle you being gay. I know firsthand that Protestants in general aren't overwhelming with their loving kindness towards homosexuals.

S'a funny thing, isn't it? Though I lived with my parents, I went to church and spent a lot of time with my grandma, so she's the one that's responsible for what religion I was raised - church every Sunday to Bethany Baptist for the first 7 years, and Homewood Evangelical ever since.

My mom's Lutheran, my dad was raised Catholic in the 50's, and my Grandma went back and forth. You can imagine the fun I had.

As for the gay thing - my mom freaked for a couple days, then pretended it wasn't true, and she's okay with it (as long as she doesn't have to SEE it). My dad, stepdad actually, was suprisingly supportive - his initial reaction was shock, but right away he was all "love you no matter what". As of now, my grandparents are the only ones who don't know. They'd take it the hardest and since I'm so close with them, I don't want to hurt 'em. It's not me being ashamed, it's me caring about them now that their health is deteriorating, you know?

Sorry this was so long winded *rolls eyes*

[lunabee34.livejournal.com]

No apologies for longwindedness. I'm glad your stepdad is supportive and that your mother is, if not exactly ecstastic, not angry with you. I fell intensely in like with a gal in college but things didn't work out between us (bitch :) ). I can only imagine what my parents' reaction would have been if they had. I know for a fact they *never* would have accepted me as a lesbian. And I totally get what you're saying about your grandparents. I don't think it's shameful; in a way its respectful. Can ya really change the opinion of a 75 year old anyway? There's no point in rocking the boat with them at this point.

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

I don't think it's shameful; in a way its respectful. Can ya really change the opinion of a 75 year old anyway? There's no point in rocking the boat with them at this point.

That's pretty much how I see it. I'm kind of my grandma's favorite, and it would kill her. I don't think my grandpa would understand, and if he did, he probably wouldn't care. The man's 84 years old this year. Don't know what I'll do when the day comes. *sigh*