First - something that has always peeved me: Weather in the US. Why is that major news network only cover "extreme" weather when it happens on the West or East coasts. Right now, the East cost is being pummelled with the exact, and actually a bit milder, weather than we in the midwest recieved days ago. And yet - one of the major reports on every station is "arctic chill hits New England". Right, because that weather didn't pass through here first? I'm not a big fan of the midwest, having lived here my whole life, but come on - you have to admit we have some pretty fucked up weather. But because we're not all high-society whats-its, we don't deserve coverage? Fuck off, you!
Second - any other news reports. Have you ever noticed that the only stories that actually usually get covered in the midwest are stereotypical stories? Things like men being arrested for having sex with ponies? Or "farmer beats wife for years" or "children twice as likely to attend Bible school and drink milk". Granted, we're not the most exciting crowd, but it's better than hearing that another star is born SoCal or another politician is scandalous in DC. Fuck off, you!
Next up: People in general. Why can't people say what they mean? Why is that society has taught us that honesty = bad. Or not even that so much. If I don't like someone, I just don't talk to them. Or if I have to talk to them, I am polite but make it as short as possible. Why is it so difficult for people to do that, instead of rambling on about how much they detest someone and for what reasons. That's dumb and stupid entirely childish. It is entirely possible to tell someone you don't enjoy their company without being an asshat. We've just been taught that it isn't "nice." Nice? Who cares about nice - I say let's be honest. Society - to you I say, Fuck off, you!
Another one: Low-carb, carbless, zero carb, atkins FREAKS. Don't tell me I eat too many carbs. I enjoy, you know, being able to hold my head up by my own power. And also, I enjoy eating things like bread and potatoes. Wanna actually lose weight - get off your fat ass. It's amusing to me, however the amount of people that justhave the pounds slide off when they stop eating carbs. But the minute they eat a bagel chip they swell to Macy's float balloons. I'm afraid of going into a restaurant in the next few years and having to specifically ask for my carbs. "Oh, and can you add carbs to that, please? Yes, I know it's $.50 extra, but I do so loves my carbs. There'll be a bigger tip for you in it!" Atkins, Fuck off, you!
And finally: cliche, I know, but Cell Phones. I have one, I use it. But I draw the line at using when other people are around, unless it is, in fact, an emergency. I at least have the courtesy to understand that other people may not want to know that my cell-phone friend has strange and unusal creatures crawling out of her whose-it. That's why, if I'm in a crowded place and I get a phone call, I either take it outside and away from others, or I check for an emergency and politely tell the caller I'll call them back. Really not that difficult. Another issue are the damn ringers. I'm all for individualism - you like the theme song to Eight is Enough or the song Drop it Like it's Hawt, hey, great for you! But it doesn't mean I need it to burst my eardrums. Not everyone in a three mile radius needs to know you have a phone call. All I'm asking here is for a little common courtesy. If you're going to be somewhere that is crowded with people (who also probably have cell phones), put it on vibrate. Or, if you must have some metalic ding to alert you, I recommend setting it on the "one beep/vibrate" option. Because really, how many *other* things are going to spontaneously start ringing and buzzing in your pants? Cell Phone users, Fuck off, you!
This is all for now, but you'll be pleased to know I have a plethora of them floating around in my head.
