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Okay, so because of popular demand, I've written another installment in what I'll call the "What the?" fic. You can find the first part here. As with the last, please feel free to leave feedback. I wanna know what you think. God, bad, horrible, wonderful. Whatever ;) I think I might really get into this fic stuff:P
Without further ado:
Title: Coverless
Pairing: S/X
Rating: PG-13 for sexual content
Disclaimer: I own nothing, but enjoy playing.
*Argh!!* “Bed? Why the bed? Why can’t we stand here and talk like two people? Accept you’re not people, I mean, a person. I’m a person. You were a person once. But now you’re not. And I am. A clumsy person. And I dropped the popcorn; I’ll go make some more. Yeah, popcorn. With the butter, and the, the salt. Do we have any Snickers bars left, or did you eat them all?”
RETREAT RETREAT!!! Back away slowly! Do no, I repeat, do *not* look up from the floor. Leave the bowl where it is, and just turn around and go to the kitchen. And since when did my voice start sounding like Buffy’s pouty voice? Did my man parts just get sucked up into my stomach or did they run away whimpering or something? Geeze, Harris. Real manly. I bet that makes the naked! vampire want you. Next thing you know, you’ll be rambling about when Uncle Rory gave you five bucks to put on a hula skirt and do the Macarena, and we’re soooo not going there. Hey, what do you know, the no-no box is broke. That’s the last time I buy my mental locks at Wally World, that’s for damn sure.
Popcorn, yes, “kitchen” now. And don’t I wish I had a bigger place right about now? S’not like I can go into the bathroom without making a very obvious statement about the matter of *things*. Stupid basement. Only one thing worth staying here for. Because Spike can’t get out in the day. And it’s funny to watch him pace back and forth in front of the door chain-smoking because he’s got, er, basement fever? Here, Snickers, here yummy tasty chocolate…
“S’matter, pet? You gone ‘round the bend or something? Thought we were gonna talk?”
Huh? That didn’t sound all “come hither”. What the hell? Uh oh, it’s probably some vampire seduction tactic. Well it’s not working, mister. Uh, well, um, okay, *things* could say differently. Stage 3 has been achieved. Red alert! Red alert! Must bring down pressure before explosion! Must yank the red lever down. Where oh where is that red lever? Hmph, probly in the same place that damn Snickers bar is.
“Looking for this?” Ooo, flying chocolate. Only a few things better than that…Must not turn around. Stage 3 is still in effect. Must not cause excess pressure. Wait, is it really such a good idea to have my back turned to the big dumb drop-dead-gorgeous naked probably horny vampire who’s looking to pull his own kind of lever? And also, where did he get this candy bar? *Mental note – BEAT VAMPIRE UNCONCIOUS FOR HORDING CHOCOLATE*
“Spike, how can I talk to you on the *bed*?” Stupid sweaty fingers – way to fumble the prized nectar of the gods. Now I have to turn around and bend over to pick it up. Well, if I just close my eyes and…“Especially if you’re sitting there in nothing but socks and…huh?” Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Boxers? Where in the hell did he get those?
“Hey! Those are mine!!! Why are you wearing them?” Dissapointed, are we, Harris? Jeeze, get a grip, will ya?
“What?! Didn’t think you’d want me sitting around stark naked in your parent’s flat. *I’d* like to see their faces if they saw that, but I doubt you would. Sides…it’s cold in here, Harris!”
“I, um, uh, what? You know, for someone who’s not supposed to *feel* heat or cold, you sure are cold a lot.”
“Only one way to warm me up, pet.” He’s getting closer again! What the hell?!
“What, cram your butt into the toaster?” Still closer! RED ALERT RED ALERT!!! He’s gonna blow!!!
“Wrong answer, pet, but close.” Where’s that hand going? *ULP*
Without further ado:
Title: Coverless
Pairing: S/X
Rating: PG-13 for sexual content
Disclaimer: I own nothing, but enjoy playing.
*Argh!!* “Bed? Why the bed? Why can’t we stand here and talk like two people? Accept you’re not people, I mean, a person. I’m a person. You were a person once. But now you’re not. And I am. A clumsy person. And I dropped the popcorn; I’ll go make some more. Yeah, popcorn. With the butter, and the, the salt. Do we have any Snickers bars left, or did you eat them all?”
RETREAT RETREAT!!! Back away slowly! Do no, I repeat, do *not* look up from the floor. Leave the bowl where it is, and just turn around and go to the kitchen. And since when did my voice start sounding like Buffy’s pouty voice? Did my man parts just get sucked up into my stomach or did they run away whimpering or something? Geeze, Harris. Real manly. I bet that makes the naked! vampire want you. Next thing you know, you’ll be rambling about when Uncle Rory gave you five bucks to put on a hula skirt and do the Macarena, and we’re soooo not going there. Hey, what do you know, the no-no box is broke. That’s the last time I buy my mental locks at Wally World, that’s for damn sure.
Popcorn, yes, “kitchen” now. And don’t I wish I had a bigger place right about now? S’not like I can go into the bathroom without making a very obvious statement about the matter of *things*. Stupid basement. Only one thing worth staying here for. Because Spike can’t get out in the day. And it’s funny to watch him pace back and forth in front of the door chain-smoking because he’s got, er, basement fever? Here, Snickers, here yummy tasty chocolate…
“S’matter, pet? You gone ‘round the bend or something? Thought we were gonna talk?”
Huh? That didn’t sound all “come hither”. What the hell? Uh oh, it’s probably some vampire seduction tactic. Well it’s not working, mister. Uh, well, um, okay, *things* could say differently. Stage 3 has been achieved. Red alert! Red alert! Must bring down pressure before explosion! Must yank the red lever down. Where oh where is that red lever? Hmph, probly in the same place that damn Snickers bar is.
“Looking for this?” Ooo, flying chocolate. Only a few things better than that…Must not turn around. Stage 3 is still in effect. Must not cause excess pressure. Wait, is it really such a good idea to have my back turned to the big dumb drop-dead-gorgeous naked probably horny vampire who’s looking to pull his own kind of lever? And also, where did he get this candy bar? *Mental note – BEAT VAMPIRE UNCONCIOUS FOR HORDING CHOCOLATE*
“Spike, how can I talk to you on the *bed*?” Stupid sweaty fingers – way to fumble the prized nectar of the gods. Now I have to turn around and bend over to pick it up. Well, if I just close my eyes and…“Especially if you’re sitting there in nothing but socks and…huh?” Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Boxers? Where in the hell did he get those?
“Hey! Those are mine!!! Why are you wearing them?” Dissapointed, are we, Harris? Jeeze, get a grip, will ya?
“What?! Didn’t think you’d want me sitting around stark naked in your parent’s flat. *I’d* like to see their faces if they saw that, but I doubt you would. Sides…it’s cold in here, Harris!”
“I, um, uh, what? You know, for someone who’s not supposed to *feel* heat or cold, you sure are cold a lot.”
“Only one way to warm me up, pet.” He’s getting closer again! What the hell?!
“What, cram your butt into the toaster?” Still closer! RED ALERT RED ALERT!!! He’s gonna blow!!!
“Wrong answer, pet, but close.” Where’s that hand going? *ULP*
From:
no subject
Do something FAST or he's gonna blow!!
Ack, the pressure!!
Ninja turtle boxers? Oh my, you are a FREAK.
A total freak.
*bounce*
Dude, funny and cute, poor Spike must be totatlly bewildered.
*nice icon*
From:
Hee!!!
And yes, Spike is bewildered. And horny. LOL.
Yeah, I loves me new Icon!
From:
Re: Hee!!!
Heee.
Horny is good.
:)
*smut!!*
From:
no subject