"How big is your cock?"

[synapticjava]

Man, I have so lost what little faith I had gay men. Permenately, I fear. Why are people so apt to just fuck each other? I don't freaking get it. It's not what I want. I don't understand how that's what anyone wants. Yeah, I used to do that, but that was the typical "comming out and be slutty" phase that 80% of us go through. It was a learning experience. I'm just a little disheartened that that is all anyone seems to care about anymore - where they kind find their next piece of ass. How can anyone claim that annonymous one-time fucking around is anywhere near as good as when there are emotions involved? Why is sex what seems to drive *everyone*? Why is it so important? Why does it control so much? Why don't more people ask these questions or feel this way? It has been my experience that sex with just anyone, while sometimes fun, isn't nearly the extremely beautiful and sensuous thing it can be when you care about the person, when they care about you. When you catch their eyes and you have this bond and everything in the entire world just makes sense. When you are that close with someone that nothing else even matters. When it physically hurts you how much you love that person. How you want to just wrap your body so tightly around them that you become apart of them...That warmth that comes with arms around you and on you and the touch and the kiss and the whispers. How is just raw emotionless getting off anywhere near what making love is? Can someone explain this to me? Please? Because I don't get it. I don't want it. I want the tenderness and the passion and racing pulse and the flushed skin and the swollen lips and that feeling, that incredible feeling. I don't want to settle for less than that. I wouldn't think anyone else would. But I guess I'm wrong...

Comments

[coriandre.livejournal.com]

the reason why it is important to have random meaningless one-night heresyourtoweltheresthedoor sex is because it makes us realise, although it feels good, what we really want which is something empowering. Having meaningless sex is like masturbating with an understanding that you want more. You can't understand that just masturbating. Not the same way. You know? You will get what you deserve... I really believe it. Now is not the time to give up. No ma'am - I love you.

Yeah

[chocgood84.livejournal.com]

I want this *points to icon*. I want it so bad it aches. But I don't want all the bullshit drama of "meeting" all these sleezy scuzzy over-sexed fags. Eh, I guess that's what it's all about. *sigh*. I'm not giving up. I'm just very skeptical about everything romantic/love right now.