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First of all, thought I'd let you know that I redesigned my website. Go lookee. And second of all:
Title: In Sunlight or Shadow (15/18)
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
chocgood84
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: NC-17 overall
Notes: Vamp!Xander series; the usual applies: blood play, smut, schmoop and man-luvin.
Previous parts: here.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Spike, Xander, or Buffy the Vampire Slayer. If I did, this wouldn’t be fanfic, it’d be cannon. These belong to Mutant Enemy and its creator, Joss Whedon. No harm, no foul.
The jig is up, Xander half-realized as both Buffy and Willow took large steps away from them. The cat’s out of the bag. At least I don’t have to worry about Buffy staking me. Because Xander understood; he knew that his own demon had come tearing to the surface, that his skin was turning black and smoking. Knew he only had a few precious moments left on this earth.
“First, huh? And second – you have some mighty big explaining to do, Sir-Bleach-A-Lot and Newly-Afraid-of-Sunlight-Boy,” Buffy screeched in a tone just under ear-bleed level.
“What?” Xander screamed, consumed by the almighty fire of…nothing. As in, nothing was happening. No smoke signals, no blackening of the flesh. Not even mild flame-kissed char line. But he was starting to get a cramp from the stronghold Spike had on him.
“Love you so much, Xander…we’ll be together again. Soon, just a little bit, love. Love you so much; you’ve made me so much better. Xander, my Xander, my love,” Spike was mumbling, repeating, praying.
“Uh, Spike? I think we’re good – can you, and I never thought I’d say this, get off me now?”
“Gross,” Buffy huffed. Xander glanced at her through the smidgeon of a hole between Spike’s locked limbs around him and saw a look on her face he hadn’t seen since the time he’d lost his Twinkie and she’d found it in her underwear drawer. Not a good look, he thought.
“Wait, what?” Spike asked, confused but intrigued. And suddenly the air that Xander didn’t need was being allowed back into his body, as Spike released his possessive hold on Xander.
“Why are we not burning?” Xander wondered aloud.
“Hmph, wonder how long this has been going on,” Spike followed suit. “And what else can we do?” He asked, casting an evil glance toward his undead lover.
“Must be something with the shadow-whatevers. Oh, god, Spike!” Xander exclaimed, realizing how close he came to almost losing Spike. It left a nasty taste in his mouth that only seconds before he’d almost been urn-food. But what was worse was that he wouldn’t be able to touch Spike, hold him, taste him. Needing contact, he pulled Spike back to him, crushing the other vampire in a vice grip.
“Oi!” Spike shouted, wincing as he felt something inside him crack ever so slightly. “Love, I appreciate the sentiment, but uh, could you…” Spike trailed off when Xander gave him his patented Puppy Eyes. Suddenly, no broken bone was worth disappointing those eyes. “Damn eyes,” he muttered.
After a moment or twelve, Xander finally let up on his undeath-squeeze, much to Spike’s pleasure. Spike leant in for a confirming kiss, but was rudely interrupted by not one, but two, people clearing their throats.
“Start talking, or I start getting dusty,” Buffy said through tight lips. One hand on her hip and the other twitching close to her stake-pocket.
“Buffy!” Willow shrieked, putting a hand on the Slayer’s arm, a muted attempt to stop her from actually doing anything physical.
“Buffy, calm down, really. It’s okay,” Tara said with a soothing voice, calm and tranquil in the face of a potentially volatile situation. Tara also reached out a hand to the ticked off Slayer, only to be batted back by a quick and angered hand.
“NO it is not okay!” She screamed. “Why does everyone keep saying that?”
“Really, Buffy,” Tara started to say. But Buffy wouldn’t have any of it. Before anyone could react, she had her stake in hand and poised to strike. She took only a half a step towards the two non-living group patrons before she found herself sprawled on the pavement, Mr. Pointy in splinters beside her. A very pointy-toothed Xander stood above her, snarling down at her.
“You do not want to do that, Buff,” he said through lips locked in hatred. “You do not have power over what is mine, and you will not threaten what is mine.”
“Xander, will you fucking calm down?” Willow shrieked. “That’s not helping anything!”
“Glinda, you better control your mate there – this doesn’t concern her,” Spike snarled. This was between Buffy and Xander. And it wasn’t going to be pretty.
“Hey! I –“ Willow was abruptly silenced by Tara’s hand over her mouth. When she turned to glare at the other witch, Tara only shook her head. That seemed to be enough to silence the redhead.
“You are sooo going to be sorry for that, Xander,” Buffy threatened. She started to her feet, only to be surprised and knocked back down by Spike. The glower she shot him had a hint of holy water and a dash of crucifix, and even the Big Bad had to back off just a little.
“You need to shut up, Buffy – listen to him.” Spike lectured.
“I don’t have to listen to anyone without a soul,” she shot back.
“Then how bout you listen to someone who let you cry on their shoulder when your own boyfriend, a man without a soul, skipped town?” Xander fired at her. Direct hit, if the look in her eyes was anything to judge by.
“How could you do it, Xander?” Buffy asked, her hazel eyes clouding to brown. “How could you let him…why?”
“First of all, I didn’t let him do it,” Xander replied, feeling Spike’s hand firmly on his back. Support, love, and hope thrived in that connection. “And second of all, you won’t understand, Buffy. You never do.”
“Why don’t you try me, Xander? Why don’t you try talking to me? It’s him,” Buffy muttered, venom in her voice and hatred in the look she shot Spike. “Ever since he’s been in your life, you don’t talk to us. You don’t want to be around us. You haven’t been the same since…” And finally the tears fell when she realized just how long this had been brewing.
“That’s right, Buffy. I haven’t been human since I came back. Since I rescued Spike,” Xander spoke with words that soft, but protective. Nothing is going to take this away from me, he thought.
“What do you mean, ‘rescued Spike’?” She asked through trembling lips.
“I think that’s a longer story than we have time for now, Buff,” Xander admitted, forcing his demon back down inside him. Somehow he felt that it would maybe help things, maybe soften it for her. He didn’t want to hurt her – not really. He just wanted her to…understand; wanted her acceptance.
“Is it?” She asked sourly. “Or is it that you don’t care enough to tell it?”
“That’s a low blow, Buffy,” Xander replied just as bitterly.
“Seems fair, somehow, Xander. Don’t you think?” Her tears of loss had turned to a hard face of weariness and of despise. Xander knew she’d never really understand…never really trust him again. But somehow he couldn’t bring himself to care.
“He would have died, Buffy,” Spike whispered. They were all surprised to hear the softness there, the tenderness that punched straight through the tension. “He would have been dead. I couldn’t let that happen, Buffy. Not after…not after everything.”
Xander felt tears stinging his eyes, salt on his lips. He turned from Buffy to envelop Spike in the only way he knew how – love. Touching tenderly, embracing fiercely, he pulled the blonde man to him, wrapping his arms around him and feeling pain inside himself when he felt and heard the older man weep. Crying for forgiveness and screaming for absolution for a sin no judge would find him guilty of. Instead of trying to quiet him, Xander let him cry; he let Spike let go of the pain and the torture he hadn’t known he carried.
“Why?” Willow asked, breaking the silence that had fallen between Slayer and friend.
“He was,” Xander tried, choking on the sobs he hadn’t realized he was holding back. “He was dying, Willow. I found him in that tomb, and he was dying. And I knew…I knew the only way to save him was to give myself to him, to feed him.”
“Xander-“ Willow tried, but couldn’t find the words.
“Willow, it was my fault!” Xander shouted. To Willow, to Buffy, to the world. His own self-hatred was boiling deep inside himself.
“I couldn’t let it happen. And I didn’t. I went and I cut myself open,” Xander explained, turning back to them and showing where he’d sliced his flesh apart and opened an artery to give his life for the one person he truly loved. “I gave it to him; gave him everything. I kissed him, told him I loved him, and the next thing I know…”
“I brought him back,” Spike whispered, running his hands up and down Xander’s arms – needing to feel him, to know he was real. “He didn’t let me do it, and it’s not his fault. I just couldn’t bear it, couldn’t let him die like that. Not for me – I don’t deserve it.”
“Yes you do, Spike,” Tara said. They all turned their heads to her. “Willow, don’t you see it?” She asked.
“See what, Tara?” Willow asked, not understanding something.
“See them,” Tara responded, cryptic but urging. “Their souls.”
“That’s not possible, Tara,” Buffy said, soft and lonely. For the first time, she allowed here gaze to meet Xander’s. So much sadness there. “Vampires don’t have souls.”
“You’re wrong, Buffy. You can’t see what I can,” Tara whispered. She stepped forward, wrapping her arms around Spike. No fear, no disgust – only love, and trust. Acceptance.
Spike fumbled for a moment, unsure of what to do. Part of him screamed to turn and run or fight or say something, but the other part of him – the part in control of his body, returned the embrace. Wrapping his own strong arms around the blonde goddess, he felt the goodness inside of her, felt the energy racing and exploding through her veins like rivers of golden sunlight streaming summer fields.
“Oh my goddess,” Willow uttered, the volume of her voice barely above a whispering breath. She too stepped forward, instead pulling Xander into a tight hug. He also panicked for a moment, but allowed those arms to entangle in his. Resting his cheek on her head, he kissed her softly, returning the hug.
“Am I missing something, or did everyone suck on little pieces of purple paper before we left?” Buffy whined. She stood from the ground, brushing herself off but stepping no closer to the vampires.
After some time passed, the two witches pulled back, and Spike and Xander found each other again – Spike’s arm draping across Xander’s shoulders and Xander’s hand snaking around Spike’s waist. They shared a kiss, tender and short – but to them, it was everything; everything they needed and everything they wanted.
“Again, I’m going with, ‘what?’” Buffy stated.
“It’s their auras, Buffy,” Willow said, as if that explained it all.
“You can’t see it, Buffy, but they’re – connected. They complete each other,” Tara explained. “Before they both disappeared, it was different, they were two different beings. But now, together, it’s like they’re one in the same.”
“Oh-kay,” Buffy said. “And this means?”
“They have souls still,” Willow stated. “Xander’s never left him, and Spike…his must have, come back.”
Spike and Xander looked at each other. Deep down, they could both feel it, but neither one of them wanted to try and explain it, didn’t need to.
“How is this possible?” Buffy asked, taking a timid step towards them, her eyes darting to the air around the two, apparently trying to see this ‘aura”.
“The prophecy,” Tara said softly.
“’The essence of Shu’,” Willow remembered. “The savior and the Phoenix.”
“The what?” Buffy said, frustrated but interested. Another timid step.
“Shu is the god of sunlight, Buffy,” Tara spoke. “And they – their color is the color of Sunlight. Phoenix is known to symbolize resurrection. Spike resurrected Xander, completing Shu. Xander is the…Savior.”
“What?” Both Buffy and Xander yelled in unison.
“Ah, prophecies. Just can’t get enough of those wacky ancients,” Willow joked, trying to lighten the mood.
“How do you know it’s not the other way around?” Spike asked.
“Because you weren’t dead. Or rather, you were already dead,” Willow clarified. “But you resurrected Xander from the dead. You said yourself he was dead, at least for a moment.”
“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean-“ Xander felt the panic rising inside him.
“Doesn’t it?” Tara countered.
“But, I can’t be-“
“Can’t you?”
“Dammit,” Xander said, groping and clutching at Spike’s duster like a child on his first day of school. Spike tightened his grip on his boy.
“So let me get this straight,” Buffy said, trying to put it all together.
“You were almost dead?” She pointed to Spike, who nodded.
“And you saved him, but died doing it?” She pointed to Xander, who nodded.
“And then you brought him back by turning him into a vampire?” Back to Spike, another nod.
“You’ve been a vampire this whole time?” Back to Xander, another nod.
“You knew about this, but didn’t say anything?” Pointing to Tara, who nodded.
“And you knew she knew?” Back to Spike and Xander, two more nods.
“You had no clue any of this was going on?” Pointing to Willow, reluctant nod.
“And now you all think that the prophecy says that when he died to save him, and came back, it completed this shoe thing which gives them both a soul and lets them wander around in the sun, and now Xander is supposed to save the world?” Four nods.
“Okay,” she mumbled. “Just so I understand.”
“Wow,” Willow said.
“Wow,” Xander repeated.
“Huh,” Buffy muttered.
Tara giggled and Spike rolled his eyes.
“You know, Xander,” Buffy spoke, taking the last few steps between them. “Go ahead and be dead, if you have a soul. I give up. But I don’t wanna know about anything that pertains to the usual bitey-badness you all tend possess. And the minute I do know, that’s it, got it?”
“I can live with that,” Xander said, cracking a smile for the first time in what felt like years. Before he could help himself, he pulled Buffy in for a hug, grinning ear to ear because for the first time, it wasn’t her that was doing the rib-cracking.
“All right, enough of the mushy shite,” Spike muttered. “We should get a move on, now that we have some light, yeah? Get Rupert, kick some arse, and shag like bunnies.”
No one disagreed, and before long they were inside the Summer’s house, stocking up on whatever weapons they could carry. Which turned out to be difficult, because, really – what could you use to kill a shadow?
“That’s just like Spike,” Buffy snarked as she hefted a scythe out of the trunk.
“What is?” Willow asked.
“Oh, you know – killing my best friend and then turning him into his undead lover, making him his willing sex slave,” Buffy blurted. Realizing what she’d said, she wrinkled her nose. “And, ew.”
“Hey guys?” Xander asked from the window he was keeping watch at.
“What is it, Xander?” Willow asked, cramming magic supplies and tools into her bag.
“There’s not supposed to be an eclipse or anything today, is there?”
“No, why?” Tara wondered, crossing to the window.
“Because it’s getting really dark, really fast,” he explained.
The words were barely out of his mouth when the light outside faded completely to blackness. No fog rolled in, only pure inky sticky darkness that seemed to swallow them whole. The beacon of light spell that Willow had created was still in place, and the darker it grew outside, the brighter the sphere of light became.
Not for the first time in the last few days, the dead silence was wracked with an explosion – but this time, it came from beneath them. What felt like a powerful earthquake exploded through the town, and in the last of the dying light, Xander could see the power station at the top of the hill outside town explode, sparks showering down on the earth around it. Throughout the town, transformers and power boxes were bursting with overloaded circuits and burning up in fire so hot it melted the metal casing around it. Only a few seconds later, they were left with darkness surrounding them and no electricity, no light, and no sound to pierce it.
“All right, that’s it,” Buffy said, rage filling her voice. “First we find Giles, and then we kill them. We kill them hard.”
Title: In Sunlight or Shadow (15/18)
Author:
chocgood84Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: NC-17 overall
Notes: Vamp!Xander series; the usual applies: blood play, smut, schmoop and man-luvin.
Previous parts: here.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Spike, Xander, or Buffy the Vampire Slayer. If I did, this wouldn’t be fanfic, it’d be cannon. These belong to Mutant Enemy and its creator, Joss Whedon. No harm, no foul.
The jig is up, Xander half-realized as both Buffy and Willow took large steps away from them. The cat’s out of the bag. At least I don’t have to worry about Buffy staking me. Because Xander understood; he knew that his own demon had come tearing to the surface, that his skin was turning black and smoking. Knew he only had a few precious moments left on this earth.
“First, huh? And second – you have some mighty big explaining to do, Sir-Bleach-A-Lot and Newly-Afraid-of-Sunlight-Boy,” Buffy screeched in a tone just under ear-bleed level.
“What?” Xander screamed, consumed by the almighty fire of…nothing. As in, nothing was happening. No smoke signals, no blackening of the flesh. Not even mild flame-kissed char line. But he was starting to get a cramp from the stronghold Spike had on him.
“Love you so much, Xander…we’ll be together again. Soon, just a little bit, love. Love you so much; you’ve made me so much better. Xander, my Xander, my love,” Spike was mumbling, repeating, praying.
“Uh, Spike? I think we’re good – can you, and I never thought I’d say this, get off me now?”
“Gross,” Buffy huffed. Xander glanced at her through the smidgeon of a hole between Spike’s locked limbs around him and saw a look on her face he hadn’t seen since the time he’d lost his Twinkie and she’d found it in her underwear drawer. Not a good look, he thought.
“Wait, what?” Spike asked, confused but intrigued. And suddenly the air that Xander didn’t need was being allowed back into his body, as Spike released his possessive hold on Xander.
“Why are we not burning?” Xander wondered aloud.
“Hmph, wonder how long this has been going on,” Spike followed suit. “And what else can we do?” He asked, casting an evil glance toward his undead lover.
“Must be something with the shadow-whatevers. Oh, god, Spike!” Xander exclaimed, realizing how close he came to almost losing Spike. It left a nasty taste in his mouth that only seconds before he’d almost been urn-food. But what was worse was that he wouldn’t be able to touch Spike, hold him, taste him. Needing contact, he pulled Spike back to him, crushing the other vampire in a vice grip.
“Oi!” Spike shouted, wincing as he felt something inside him crack ever so slightly. “Love, I appreciate the sentiment, but uh, could you…” Spike trailed off when Xander gave him his patented Puppy Eyes. Suddenly, no broken bone was worth disappointing those eyes. “Damn eyes,” he muttered.
After a moment or twelve, Xander finally let up on his undeath-squeeze, much to Spike’s pleasure. Spike leant in for a confirming kiss, but was rudely interrupted by not one, but two, people clearing their throats.
“Start talking, or I start getting dusty,” Buffy said through tight lips. One hand on her hip and the other twitching close to her stake-pocket.
“Buffy!” Willow shrieked, putting a hand on the Slayer’s arm, a muted attempt to stop her from actually doing anything physical.
“Buffy, calm down, really. It’s okay,” Tara said with a soothing voice, calm and tranquil in the face of a potentially volatile situation. Tara also reached out a hand to the ticked off Slayer, only to be batted back by a quick and angered hand.
“NO it is not okay!” She screamed. “Why does everyone keep saying that?”
“Really, Buffy,” Tara started to say. But Buffy wouldn’t have any of it. Before anyone could react, she had her stake in hand and poised to strike. She took only a half a step towards the two non-living group patrons before she found herself sprawled on the pavement, Mr. Pointy in splinters beside her. A very pointy-toothed Xander stood above her, snarling down at her.
“You do not want to do that, Buff,” he said through lips locked in hatred. “You do not have power over what is mine, and you will not threaten what is mine.”
“Xander, will you fucking calm down?” Willow shrieked. “That’s not helping anything!”
“Glinda, you better control your mate there – this doesn’t concern her,” Spike snarled. This was between Buffy and Xander. And it wasn’t going to be pretty.
“Hey! I –“ Willow was abruptly silenced by Tara’s hand over her mouth. When she turned to glare at the other witch, Tara only shook her head. That seemed to be enough to silence the redhead.
“You are sooo going to be sorry for that, Xander,” Buffy threatened. She started to her feet, only to be surprised and knocked back down by Spike. The glower she shot him had a hint of holy water and a dash of crucifix, and even the Big Bad had to back off just a little.
“You need to shut up, Buffy – listen to him.” Spike lectured.
“I don’t have to listen to anyone without a soul,” she shot back.
“Then how bout you listen to someone who let you cry on their shoulder when your own boyfriend, a man without a soul, skipped town?” Xander fired at her. Direct hit, if the look in her eyes was anything to judge by.
“How could you do it, Xander?” Buffy asked, her hazel eyes clouding to brown. “How could you let him…why?”
“First of all, I didn’t let him do it,” Xander replied, feeling Spike’s hand firmly on his back. Support, love, and hope thrived in that connection. “And second of all, you won’t understand, Buffy. You never do.”
“Why don’t you try me, Xander? Why don’t you try talking to me? It’s him,” Buffy muttered, venom in her voice and hatred in the look she shot Spike. “Ever since he’s been in your life, you don’t talk to us. You don’t want to be around us. You haven’t been the same since…” And finally the tears fell when she realized just how long this had been brewing.
“That’s right, Buffy. I haven’t been human since I came back. Since I rescued Spike,” Xander spoke with words that soft, but protective. Nothing is going to take this away from me, he thought.
“What do you mean, ‘rescued Spike’?” She asked through trembling lips.
“I think that’s a longer story than we have time for now, Buff,” Xander admitted, forcing his demon back down inside him. Somehow he felt that it would maybe help things, maybe soften it for her. He didn’t want to hurt her – not really. He just wanted her to…understand; wanted her acceptance.
“Is it?” She asked sourly. “Or is it that you don’t care enough to tell it?”
“That’s a low blow, Buffy,” Xander replied just as bitterly.
“Seems fair, somehow, Xander. Don’t you think?” Her tears of loss had turned to a hard face of weariness and of despise. Xander knew she’d never really understand…never really trust him again. But somehow he couldn’t bring himself to care.
“He would have died, Buffy,” Spike whispered. They were all surprised to hear the softness there, the tenderness that punched straight through the tension. “He would have been dead. I couldn’t let that happen, Buffy. Not after…not after everything.”
Xander felt tears stinging his eyes, salt on his lips. He turned from Buffy to envelop Spike in the only way he knew how – love. Touching tenderly, embracing fiercely, he pulled the blonde man to him, wrapping his arms around him and feeling pain inside himself when he felt and heard the older man weep. Crying for forgiveness and screaming for absolution for a sin no judge would find him guilty of. Instead of trying to quiet him, Xander let him cry; he let Spike let go of the pain and the torture he hadn’t known he carried.
“Why?” Willow asked, breaking the silence that had fallen between Slayer and friend.
“He was,” Xander tried, choking on the sobs he hadn’t realized he was holding back. “He was dying, Willow. I found him in that tomb, and he was dying. And I knew…I knew the only way to save him was to give myself to him, to feed him.”
“Xander-“ Willow tried, but couldn’t find the words.
“Willow, it was my fault!” Xander shouted. To Willow, to Buffy, to the world. His own self-hatred was boiling deep inside himself.
“I couldn’t let it happen. And I didn’t. I went and I cut myself open,” Xander explained, turning back to them and showing where he’d sliced his flesh apart and opened an artery to give his life for the one person he truly loved. “I gave it to him; gave him everything. I kissed him, told him I loved him, and the next thing I know…”
“I brought him back,” Spike whispered, running his hands up and down Xander’s arms – needing to feel him, to know he was real. “He didn’t let me do it, and it’s not his fault. I just couldn’t bear it, couldn’t let him die like that. Not for me – I don’t deserve it.”
“Yes you do, Spike,” Tara said. They all turned their heads to her. “Willow, don’t you see it?” She asked.
“See what, Tara?” Willow asked, not understanding something.
“See them,” Tara responded, cryptic but urging. “Their souls.”
“That’s not possible, Tara,” Buffy said, soft and lonely. For the first time, she allowed here gaze to meet Xander’s. So much sadness there. “Vampires don’t have souls.”
“You’re wrong, Buffy. You can’t see what I can,” Tara whispered. She stepped forward, wrapping her arms around Spike. No fear, no disgust – only love, and trust. Acceptance.
Spike fumbled for a moment, unsure of what to do. Part of him screamed to turn and run or fight or say something, but the other part of him – the part in control of his body, returned the embrace. Wrapping his own strong arms around the blonde goddess, he felt the goodness inside of her, felt the energy racing and exploding through her veins like rivers of golden sunlight streaming summer fields.
“Oh my goddess,” Willow uttered, the volume of her voice barely above a whispering breath. She too stepped forward, instead pulling Xander into a tight hug. He also panicked for a moment, but allowed those arms to entangle in his. Resting his cheek on her head, he kissed her softly, returning the hug.
“Am I missing something, or did everyone suck on little pieces of purple paper before we left?” Buffy whined. She stood from the ground, brushing herself off but stepping no closer to the vampires.
After some time passed, the two witches pulled back, and Spike and Xander found each other again – Spike’s arm draping across Xander’s shoulders and Xander’s hand snaking around Spike’s waist. They shared a kiss, tender and short – but to them, it was everything; everything they needed and everything they wanted.
“Again, I’m going with, ‘what?’” Buffy stated.
“It’s their auras, Buffy,” Willow said, as if that explained it all.
“You can’t see it, Buffy, but they’re – connected. They complete each other,” Tara explained. “Before they both disappeared, it was different, they were two different beings. But now, together, it’s like they’re one in the same.”
“Oh-kay,” Buffy said. “And this means?”
“They have souls still,” Willow stated. “Xander’s never left him, and Spike…his must have, come back.”
Spike and Xander looked at each other. Deep down, they could both feel it, but neither one of them wanted to try and explain it, didn’t need to.
“How is this possible?” Buffy asked, taking a timid step towards them, her eyes darting to the air around the two, apparently trying to see this ‘aura”.
“The prophecy,” Tara said softly.
“’The essence of Shu’,” Willow remembered. “The savior and the Phoenix.”
“The what?” Buffy said, frustrated but interested. Another timid step.
“Shu is the god of sunlight, Buffy,” Tara spoke. “And they – their color is the color of Sunlight. Phoenix is known to symbolize resurrection. Spike resurrected Xander, completing Shu. Xander is the…Savior.”
“What?” Both Buffy and Xander yelled in unison.
“Ah, prophecies. Just can’t get enough of those wacky ancients,” Willow joked, trying to lighten the mood.
“How do you know it’s not the other way around?” Spike asked.
“Because you weren’t dead. Or rather, you were already dead,” Willow clarified. “But you resurrected Xander from the dead. You said yourself he was dead, at least for a moment.”
“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean-“ Xander felt the panic rising inside him.
“Doesn’t it?” Tara countered.
“But, I can’t be-“
“Can’t you?”
“Dammit,” Xander said, groping and clutching at Spike’s duster like a child on his first day of school. Spike tightened his grip on his boy.
“So let me get this straight,” Buffy said, trying to put it all together.
“You were almost dead?” She pointed to Spike, who nodded.
“And you saved him, but died doing it?” She pointed to Xander, who nodded.
“And then you brought him back by turning him into a vampire?” Back to Spike, another nod.
“You’ve been a vampire this whole time?” Back to Xander, another nod.
“You knew about this, but didn’t say anything?” Pointing to Tara, who nodded.
“And you knew she knew?” Back to Spike and Xander, two more nods.
“You had no clue any of this was going on?” Pointing to Willow, reluctant nod.
“And now you all think that the prophecy says that when he died to save him, and came back, it completed this shoe thing which gives them both a soul and lets them wander around in the sun, and now Xander is supposed to save the world?” Four nods.
“Okay,” she mumbled. “Just so I understand.”
“Wow,” Willow said.
“Wow,” Xander repeated.
“Huh,” Buffy muttered.
Tara giggled and Spike rolled his eyes.
“You know, Xander,” Buffy spoke, taking the last few steps between them. “Go ahead and be dead, if you have a soul. I give up. But I don’t wanna know about anything that pertains to the usual bitey-badness you all tend possess. And the minute I do know, that’s it, got it?”
“I can live with that,” Xander said, cracking a smile for the first time in what felt like years. Before he could help himself, he pulled Buffy in for a hug, grinning ear to ear because for the first time, it wasn’t her that was doing the rib-cracking.
“All right, enough of the mushy shite,” Spike muttered. “We should get a move on, now that we have some light, yeah? Get Rupert, kick some arse, and shag like bunnies.”
No one disagreed, and before long they were inside the Summer’s house, stocking up on whatever weapons they could carry. Which turned out to be difficult, because, really – what could you use to kill a shadow?
“That’s just like Spike,” Buffy snarked as she hefted a scythe out of the trunk.
“What is?” Willow asked.
“Oh, you know – killing my best friend and then turning him into his undead lover, making him his willing sex slave,” Buffy blurted. Realizing what she’d said, she wrinkled her nose. “And, ew.”
“Hey guys?” Xander asked from the window he was keeping watch at.
“What is it, Xander?” Willow asked, cramming magic supplies and tools into her bag.
“There’s not supposed to be an eclipse or anything today, is there?”
“No, why?” Tara wondered, crossing to the window.
“Because it’s getting really dark, really fast,” he explained.
The words were barely out of his mouth when the light outside faded completely to blackness. No fog rolled in, only pure inky sticky darkness that seemed to swallow them whole. The beacon of light spell that Willow had created was still in place, and the darker it grew outside, the brighter the sphere of light became.
Not for the first time in the last few days, the dead silence was wracked with an explosion – but this time, it came from beneath them. What felt like a powerful earthquake exploded through the town, and in the last of the dying light, Xander could see the power station at the top of the hill outside town explode, sparks showering down on the earth around it. Throughout the town, transformers and power boxes were bursting with overloaded circuits and burning up in fire so hot it melted the metal casing around it. Only a few seconds later, they were left with darkness surrounding them and no electricity, no light, and no sound to pierce it.
“All right, that’s it,” Buffy said, rage filling her voice. “First we find Giles, and then we kill them. We kill them hard.”