synapticjava: (rainbow)
synapticjava ([personal profile] synapticjava) wrote2009-05-24 01:56 am

But he was gone when autumn came

Ouch. This song hurts tonight. Damn you Thank you, Susan Boyle, for sending me fleeing back to Les Mis. BTW, your voice makes me shiver my timbers. I'm just sayin.

Actually I'm in a pleasent mood. Work was good. The group of kids we momentarily have are great kids. It was an easy night. A little heavy on the baby talk, but nice. Cari found out today she's having a boy. Don't get me wrong - I'm happy for her, and I know how much she wants to have a baby and can't wait. And I'm genuinely excited for her. But on the proverbial other hand, really? There's nothing else going on? Really? I just don't get it.

Maybe I'm just bored with things lately. Scratch that: I'm definetely bored with things lately. I probably shouldn't say that - I'm just asking for trouble. The fact of the matter is that now that I'm finally feeling good about things again, I'm ready for the next part to start. I want my next challenge. I want the next thing to begin. And it will, I'm just impatient.

I feel like I've gotten to the point where I've got all I can out of my current situation. Which when I think about it, is a lot. I've been reading through old entries from chicago, college, and when I first got here to IN. And I can't believe how different I am, how much I've grown and changed. I had a really great relationship, and I've survived after it ended. I found something I'm really good at and enjoy doing. I'm more comfortable with myself and being me than I ever have been in my life. I think my writing has improved a lot. Unlike Chicago, which I still feel like I fled from, I think here I accomplished what I needed to. So I guess the thing I'm focusing on now, the question is: what now? What next?