synapticjava | Learn to be Lonely Update

Title: Learn to be Lonely Chapter 10/?
Author:

chocgood84
Rating: NC-17 for brief violence and sexual content
Pairing: BtVS Spike/Xander
Author’s Note: Yes, I am aware that the timeline is a little screwed up and that Giles didn’t own the Magic Box until after Adam and after Dawn arrived. But in my reality, who’s Dawn? Adam what? Also, a huge spanking thanks to

kitty_poker1 for being my official L2BL beta.
Disclaimer: These character’s aren’t mine, never were; I don’t get any profit for this hobby, so don’t sue – Thanks.
Warning: Brief violence, nudity, and hetero and homo sexual content and situations. And some h0t man-luvin.
Previous parts here.

“I just want to stop by the Magic Box and see if everything’s okay. By the way, I asked you to make the phone stop ringing, not make it stop ringing forever,” Xander explained as he and Spike stopped outside the shop.

“Sorry, mate. You need to specify these things,” Spike said with a smile.

“Whatever.” Xander rolled his eyes at the vampire. “Anyway, we’ll stop, I’ll say hi, they’ll ignore me, Buffy’ll threaten to stake you, and we can head to the Bronze.”

“Sounds good to me. Except the whole stopping here thing,” Spike whined.

Xander shrugged his shoulders, but smiled anyway. He was kind of surprised by how at ease he was around Spike, especially since this afternoon’s masturbation conversation. Xander should be too embarrassed to even speak to the vampire, but instead found him even easier to talk to and joke with. It made him feel oddly better that Spike admitted he did the same thing every once in a while. Xander mentally shrugged at that thought.

They made their way into a semi-busy Magic Box, complete with actual customers buying actual merchandise. Xander briefly wondered if he’d walked into an alternate universe.

“Xander!” Willow called from behind the counter, where she was slipping someone’s purchase into a brightly colored paper bag.

“Hey, Wills,” Xander replied, dodging a woman with an obnoxious toddler attached to her dress with one hand and grabbing at anything he could with the other. The frat-boy looking guy Willow had been helping streaked past him and out the door with his hat pulled down to shadow his face. Looks like another happy customer found solace in Giles’ new shipment of virility herbs, Xander snarked.

“Where have you been? I’ve been trying to get ahold of you all day!” Willow scolded as she rounded the corner and made her way towards him.

“Hmm…you know they make these things called sidewalks now? For walking places. It’s fun stuff,” Xander said a little bitterly.

“I had class all day,” Willow responded with a pout. “Anyway, I called a bunch of times. How come you didn’t answer?”

“Oh, uh, the phone had a horrible fall. Under Spike’s boot,” he explained, chuckling at the eye roll he could practically feel coming from Spike’s direction.

“Oh. Well, at least I know you’re okay,” said Willow a bit dejectedly, hugging Xander tight anyway.

“Right as rain. Or something like that, anyhow.”

Willow finally let him go, and she noticed Spike standing behind him.

“Hey, Spike.”

“Hello, Red.”

“How’s it going?”

“Unliving and loving it. Well, actually not, but that’ll change after a couple of bottles later.”

“Huh?” Willow wondered.

“Oh, nothing,” Xander interjected, taking Willow’s hand and walking them back towards the Research Pit. “What’s with the late-night busy business?”

“No clue,” Willow shrugged. “It’s been like this all day, Giles said. He’s a little peeved, because Anya didn’t show up again. By the way-“

“Hey, Tara!” Xander called, noticing the blonde flipping through some books at the table. She looked up and smiled at him.

“Hey, Xander. How are you?” she asked with genuine interest.

“Oh, can’t complain,” he lied. “Well, I could, but it wouldn’t do a whole lot of good, now would it?”

“That’s probably a good way to look at it,” she giggled. “Oh, hi, Spike. How’s being the Big Bad treating you these days?”

“Eh, same old,” Spike shrugged.

“So, anyway,” Willow interrupted, ignoring the mother and grabby toddler who were waiting at the counter. “What’s going on w-“

“Hey, where’s Buff? And the G-man?” Xander inquired, trying to nonchalantly dodge the Anya issue. He lucked out when Willow noticed the customers waiting and went to help them. There was only one other woman in the store, now, and she was inching towards the door with a guilty ‘I’m not really going to buy anything’ look on her face.

“They’re training in the back,” Tara said. “They’ve been back there a while now, so they should be finished soon if you need to talk to them.”

“Speaking of talking,” Willow pushed with all her might, having finished ringing up Rosemary and her baby. With a clang, the shop was empty again, save for the four of them. Willow sat beside Tara at the bench. “What’s going on with Anya? It’s incredibly weird that she hasn’t come to work.”

“Oh yeah…that,” Xander mumbled, sinking into a chair at the table. “I kind of want to wait to tell that story once. Once Buffy and Giles get done, we’ll open that worm can, okay?”

“What worm can?” Buffy asked, coming through the door with a towel around her neck and a weary looking Watcher at her heels. “There’s a worm can? Hey, Xander.”

“Hey, Buff, G-man,” Xander nodded at them. Spike took a seat on the stairs to the loft, looking bored as usual but being unusually quiet and snarkless.

“Hello, Xander,” Giles murmured, sinking into another chair. “Buffy, do an old man a favor and bring me a cup of tea? And lock that blasted door.”

“Sure thing, Giles,” Buffy called, bouncing to the door and flipping the sign and deadbolt. A couple of minutes later she returned with the tea. “I just think it’s funny that when you want a favor you’re suddenly an ‘old man’, but when you start wheezing during training you’re only ‘tired’.”

“Ta ever so,” Giles said sarcastically. Buffy just rolled her eyes and flopped onto the stool and popped open her Fresca.

“So, the worm can, what’s the story?” she asked.

“Xander’s about to fess up about Anya being all M.I.A.” Willow explained, scooting closer to Tara.

“If he wants to,” Tara chided.

“Of course he wants to,” Willow insisted. “You do, don’t you?”

“Yeah, I do, it’s just kind of a long story,” Xander explained.

“The bird flew the coop,” Spike said from the stairs.

“Apparently, not that long,” Xander said, not even bothering with a dirty look.

“What?” Willow asked. “What do you mean?”

“Okay, so the long story,” Xander sighed. “You know how me and Anya have been spending a lot more time not-together, lately?” A round of blank stares from the table told him they had forgotten that. “Anyway, we haven’t really been couple of the year lately. A couple of days ago she called me and told me to meet her at her place that night.”

“The day you helped me with that bloody computer,” Giles guessed.

“Yep. Anyway, when I got there, there wasn’t anything in her apartment. It was just her. She’d been spending the last week packing and getting her stuff moved to wherever she’s going. We had a talk, or, more accurately, she talked to me and told me she’s not happy here, tired of Sunnydale, blah blah blah, and the next thing I know I’m standing in an empty apartment where my now ex-girlfriend used to live.” Way to go, Xan-man. No tears, no uncontrollable laughing. Just this empty hole in my chest that feels like someone keeps pouring salt into it.

“Oh, Xander, I’m so sorry!” Willow cried, reaching across the table and taking his hand. “That’s horrible.”

“I can’t believe she just up and left,” Buffy scowled. “Well, she obviously doesn’t know what a great guy she’s leaving behind. It’s her loss.” With that, Buffy got up and came around the table, putting her arms around Xander.

“It’ll be okay, you’ll see,” Willow said with a positive note. “You’re better off without her. I bet there’s some other girl out there. A better girl, just waiting for you.” Willow, too, got up and joined in the hugfest. For a second, it felt to Xander like it was supposed to. The way it used to, so long ago.

“I’m okay,” he half-lied. “No, really. I mean, it sucks, and, yeah, it hurts, but you know the old Hellmouth saying: What doesn’t kill you will only come back and try to kill you again.”

Buffy and Willow giggled, and released their hold on him and returned to where they had been sitting. Tara was looking skeptically at him, and Giles was just looking tired.

“Well, Xander, you know you can call us if you need anything, right?” Tara explained. “We’re here for you.”

“Totally!” Willow pepped. “So don’t go being a trooper just for us, Xander Haris.”

“No, really,” he insisted. “I’m not necessarily fine, but I’ll make do. What else can I do?”

Willow only nodded, taking Tara’s hand in hers. Something about that made the wound in his chest ache even more. After a few more minutes of silence, he rose to leave.

“Where you going?” Willow asked. “Why don’t we go back to Buffy’s and have a horror-movie marathon and pig out on Halloween Peeps and frozen pizza?”

“Ooo, that sounds fun,” Buffy agreed. “Mom’s in L.A. with a…uh, something with the gallery. I can call Riley, and Giles can come.” Giles groaned at this part. “It’ll be a whole big shindig.”

“As tempting as it is, I should get home. I’ve got a job in the morning, and I’m kinda tired.” He only half-lied. He did have a presentation, but it wasn’t until 1:00 in the afternoon. And after this afternoon, he was anything but tired.

“Oh, okay,” Willow pouted. “But why don’t you call me tomorrow, or as soon as you get a new phone, and we’ll do something, okay? Just the two of us.”

“Sounds like a plan, Stan,” Xander fake-smiled at her, hoping she wouldn’t notice.

“Good, then.” She nodded.

Buffy rose again and hugged him close, patting him on the back. “I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but it’s probably better this way.”

“I know,” he muttered, hugging her back. After a moment, she let him go with a classic Buffy smile. Once upon a time, he would have done anything for that smile. Times change.

Spike hopped up off the stairs and strode out of the room and out the door without a word.

“Xander?” Giles stood from his chair. “Are you sure you’re alright? It’s quite understandable if you’re not. I know how much Anya meant to you.”

“Thanks, G, but really, I’ll be okay.” Giles nodded with a smile.

“Alright, night all,” he called behind him as he made his way towards the door.

“Good night,” they called after him, the clang of the bell cutting off their words.

“So, drink?” Spike asked from where he was leaning against a tree, smoking a cigarette and looking like a Lucky Strikes ad.

“A thousand times yes,” Xander mumbled.

Learn to be Lonely Update - Chapter 10

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