Drunk Post #108

Yeah, I went to Gentry tonight, again.

Where I was called, by a "straight guy" a "fat slob". Not even queers have ever called me fat to my face.

This...now I'm at the bottom. Now I want nothing more than to curl up and die.

Fuck him! There's obviously something going on when a straight guy's drunk in a gay bar alone on a Saturday night picking on people. Some people call that denial; I call it being a jerk. What was really nice is that Arben and Fernando and a couple of the others came to my rescue and made him appologize to me. What I said to him is that I can always lose the weight, but he could never gain a good personality. I can't lie - what he said really did kind of hurt my feelings. But only because I call myself the same thing all the time; every time I eat or drink anything.

If you're interested

Now that I'm sober again, and as such in better control of my faculties, I've ammended last night's post to reflect the new, better way of interpreting these situations.

In other news, IT'S FUCKING FREEZING in my apartment, and there's no heat. I'm bundled up in about 12 layers under three blankets and I'm still cold. I'm also out of cigarettes, which means I have to walk the two blocks to get some. Outside. Where it's colder than it is inside. *cringe*

An excersice in mental health:

I stole this from blinding_sight who in turn stole this from rayne_y_dayze. I think it's a reall good idea for me, right now, with all that's going on.

I keep seeing bumperstickers declaring what people hate - little Calvins peeing on Chevy's logo - what have you. When did that happen? There was a time when people espoused their loves, not their hates. In defiance of all that is represented by the new brand of hate stickers, I shall list what I love - in no particular order, and omitting the obvious family stuff :-)

( So, here's a list of the thirty things that I love and that make my life better. )

Tired of me yet?

*snerk*

So, I've kinda been on my own just hanging out all day now, getting some homework and apartment stuff done.

Which is probably what I needed, because aside from being down-right exhausted, I'm feelin a little better about everything. I really need to learn when it's a good idea to pull back and take some me-time. Because it usually does the trick, I'm realizing. So, happy face. I've still got about another 40 pages to read before the party tonight, and then I have to come home and write a paper and get some stuff done on my History and Systems project. I'm really trying for a not-all-nighter. The best way for that to happen is for me to not *gasp* drink tonight. I've done it before, I can do it again. Besides, after this weekend (i.e. last night) my body will probably reject anything with "odka" on the label. I might have a glass of wine, but other than that - I'm sooooo not drinking tonight.

As for the other thing that's going on - I know how to deal with it.

Party time

I'm headed out. Gonna stop and get some flowers for the newlyweds and get to the party. It's nice and cold outside, so I get to look relatively nice. It's stupid, but I wish that guy hadn't said that last night because all day I've been obsessing over my image in the mirror. Makes you wonder, doesn't it?